#I am not immune to the silly block people

[certified3nakin]

Little sketch that I'm working on

[demigod-shenanigans]

Summary: Leo and Jason are staying with Piper over the holidays. Seeing as neither of them has ever had a snowball fight before, Piper decides it is her sacred duty as their friend to fix this.

Written for @lost-trio-week day 3: Home

Word count: ~3K

Rating: General Audiences

This fic is dedicated to my friend @queenjunothegreat! They gave me the snow day prompt all the way at the beginning of November, and this took literally a million years but lost trio week was the perfect opportunity to finally make myself sit down and write this out! I had a lot of fun writing it, and it turned out very goofy, but hopefully mostly in a good way.

It’s also technically a prequel to the first lost trio week fic I posted! You don’t need to read one to understand the other, but just know they take place vaguely in the same universe!

The valgrace in this is definitely a little more prominent than in the other fic, but it’s still a silly lost trio fic first and foremost.

———

Leo was violently ripped from sleep at not even nine in the morning. For once, it wasn’t even demigod nightmares or monsters breathing down his neck—it was just his stupid best friend excitedly shaking him awake.

He pulled the sleeping bag over his head, trying to block out the light and Piper’s enthusiasm at the same time.

“Go away,” he grumbled. “I’m asleep.”

“Oh, come on. Get up!” Piper commanded. When he still didn’t react aside from groaning sleepily, she apparently decided she was done playing nice.

Piper could have used her charmspeak. Instead, she took the zipper of Leo’s sleeping bag and pulled it all the way down until she could fold it open like a blanket, making the light stream back into his eyes.

“You’re a monster,” Leo grumbled, covering his face with his arms. “What are the holidays for if I don’t even get to sleep in?”

“Nine am isn’t that early. Your boyfriend’s been up for four hours,” she pointed out.

“Yeah, well, Jason was raised by wolves and has also been in the army since he was three. I don’t think anyone should take him as a measure for normal behavior,” he shot back, trying to get his hands on the part of the sleeping bag she’d pulled away from him. “C’mon, just let me sleep for five more minutes.”

Leo and Jason had been staying with Piper and her dad for a week. 

School wasn’t nearly as bad now that Jason was with him—which was the biggest compliment Leo had ever given any school, honestly—but he wasn’t exactly sad to be rid of it for the holidays.

Mostly, staying with Piper had been great. They sent Iris Messages constantly, but it just wasn’t the same as having her in easy hugging distance. It was nice to be here and see how things were, now that she’d had time to properly get settled in Oklahoma.

Piper had been merciful about letting Leo sleep in at first—they’d spent the two weeks before the holidays helping Jason earn his first godly recommendation letter for NRU, and as fun as that particular quest had been, it had also been exhausting, so they’d all been grateful for a little down time.

For the past three days, though, she hadn’t let him sleep past ten even once. The fact that she’d woken him at nine today was a bad sign. 

Piper wasn’t much of a morning person, really, but for some reason she’d gotten it in her head that they needed to spend as much time as they could together. In theory, Leo agreed with that sentiment. He just didn’t think all that time needed to be spent awake.

If it had been Jason waking him, Leo could have just looked at his boyfriend with big, sad eyes and had him cave in an instant. Piper, however, was immune and unyielding.

“I know what five more minutes look like to you,” Piper told him, and he didn’t need to see her face to know she was frowning at him. “Besides, you died on me, and then you ran off into the Underworld without telling me. If I say you’re getting up, you’re getting up.”

“I’m gonna be hearing that one any time you want something from me for the rest of my life, won’t I?” Leo groaned, but he slowly made himself sit up.

“Obviously.” Piper grinned, offering him a hand. “Come on. You won’t regret it, I promise.”

“Oh, I’m regretting it already,” he countered, but he took the offered hand and let her pull him up.

~~~~

“That’s it?” Leo complained. “This is what you dragged me out of bed for?”

“What do you mean, that’s it?” Piper sounded affronted as she stepped outside. “It’s snowing! And look at this snowpack. It must have been snowing all night for it to get that high.”

Her eyes were gleaming.

“You woke me up so I could watch the goddess who tried to kill us several times toss frozen water out of the sky?” Leo remained firmly planted in the doorway. He wasn’t impressed. 

Well, at least this explained why his ankle had been a bitch yesterday, he supposed.

Piper made a frustrated noise.

“Forget Khione for a second. Snow is fun, and you said you never got to experience it outside of quests. That’s criminal , and something we desperately need to fix.” She gestured towards Jason, who was standing outside, apparently trying to catch snowflakes with his tongue and hands simultaneously. “Besides, even Jason’s having fun, and we both know he’s allergic to fun usually. Loosen up!”

Focusing on Jason did the opposite of getting Leo to loosen up. His idiot boyfriend was standing outside in below thirty degree weather, and he wasn’t even wearing a fucking jacket.

Leo unhooked Jason’s jacket from the coat rack and was outside in an instant.

The snowflakes felt strange on his exposed face and hands, melting almost the second they came into contact with Leo’s skin. It wasn’t an unpleasant experience, necessarily, but in his current mood, Leo just thought of it as the world’s slowest, most impractical shower.

“Leo!” Jason’s face immediately lit up when he spotted him. This usually would have made it hard to remain grumpy, but Leo was feeling stubborn today. 

“Please try not to freeze to death, Superman. I’m not resurrecting you a second time,” he chided his boyfriend, shoving the jacket at him. “Your gloves are in the pockets.”

“I got excited.” Jason shrugged, reaching out to take the jacket from Leo. “Besides, it’s not like you’re wearing a jacket or gloves.”

“I’m a walking oven, Jase. That is not the same thing.” For all the issues Leo had had with his fire powers growing up, the fact that he never got cold had been really convenient when he’d been running away from foster care and sleeping under bridges. 

He held his warm hand to his boyfriend’s cold cheek to prove his point. Jason closed his eyes and leaned into the touch, sighing contently.

“Okay. You win.”

“I always do, Superman,” Leo said smugly, his bad mood slowly melting away. “I always do.”

“Oh good, he’s feeling better.” Piper breathed a sigh of relief. “Leo was being all grumpy because I woke him up. He wouldn’t even try to appreciate the snow.”

“You know he isn’t a morning person,” Jason told her, obviously amused. “Kissing him usually helps.”

He looked at Leo with an expression that was so utterly fond that Leo was shocked he didn’t melt the snow he was standing on into a puddle. 

Before he could get on his toes or Jason could lean down and make good on the offer in his eyes, Piper leaned over and pressed a kiss to Leo’s cheek. “There. Feel better yet?”

“Hardy har har.” Leo looked over at his best friend, who was grinning smugly. “I really do hate you sometimes.”

“No, you don’t.” Piper was grinning. 

Before Leo could be too miffed about his lack of boyfriend kisses, Jason gently put a hand on his cheek to tilt Leo’s face back toward him and leaned down to kiss him.

Leo smiled into the kiss like a total idiot. Even after several months of dating, the rush of warmth he felt kissing Jason had never really faded, and at this point, he was pretty sure it never would. He had thankfully gotten a little better about not lighting Jason’s shirts on fire by accident, though.

“Alright, alright, I’m appeased. I no longer hate Piper.” Leo was still caught in the lingering warmth of the kiss. He flushed when he realized he actually had partially melted the patch of snow they were standing on.

Jason laughed.

“Great!” Piper clapped her hands. “Moving on to the important stuff before this turns into you two just standing here making out: have either of you ever had a snowball fight before?”

“Nope,” Leo admitted. “The part of Texas I grew up in didn’t get snow, and it wasn’t really much of a thing in the states where any of my foster families lived, either.”

And, well, even if he had spent a part of his life living in an area with regular snowfall, he wouldn’t have had the friends required to pull off a snowball fight, but Leo decided he didn’t need to ruin the mood by pointing that out.

“Yeah, I thought that was the case. We’re gonna need to fix that this instant.” She turned to Jason. “How about you?”

Jason shrugged.

“Of course I’ve had snowball fights. They’re great for target practice.” 

“Are you-” Leo stared at him, then turned to Piper. “Is he fucking with us again?”

Jason had been doing this ever since they’d discovered he thought hide and seek was a combat exercise. Every time either of them mentioned a perfectly normal childhood activity, he promptly nodded and started talking about some bizarre combat version of it.

Leo had believed him at first, but between the sheer excessiveness of it and the fact that Jason’s time at Camp Jupiter was still a mess as far as memories were concerned, they’d eventually figured out he was messing with them.

“Definitely fucking with us,” Piper confirmed. “I asked Reyna about it a while back. It doesn’t snow in San Francisco.”

“How… how is she doing?” Jason asked. “Is she happy with the Hunters?”

He didn’t ask like Leo would have, teasing Piper about the excessive amount of Iris Messages they’d been sending and whether he was being replaced as her best friend.

Jason sounded almost shy when he spoke, nervously chewing his lip.

“Why don’t you ask her that?” Piper told him, clearly frustrated. “Stop treating me like I’m the mediator in your amicable divorce and just fucking talk to her yourself.”

“We never even dated!” Jason protested.

“Metaphor, Grace,” Leo informed him, flicking his boyfriend in the head. “She’s not wrong, you know. You could just reach out and tell Reyna you want to be friends again.”

“It’s not that easy,” Jason groaned, burying his face in his hands.

“The only reason it isn’t easy is that you two both love to make everything unnecessarily complicated,” Piper told him, leaning down to gather snow in her hands. “You want to be friends with her. She wants to be friends with you. Why does that have to be complicated?”

“The memory stuff-” Jason protested, but Piper interrupted him.

“-isn’t ideal, I know. But you could manage. Leo and I did.” She straightened again, snow gathered in her gloved fingers. “The fact that you both clearly still care deeply about each other is the only thing that should matter at the end of the day.” 

“But-”

She stepped a little closer to Jason, unceremoniously dumping the snow she’d gathered down the back of his jacket.

He yelped.

“What was that for?”

“You’re being an idiot!” she told him. “And also, I came out here to have a snowball fight with my friends, not to play friendship counselor!”

“Sorry,” Jason said, looking sheepish as he shook the snow out of his jacket. “Let’s have a snowball fight, then.”

“Fantastic.” Piper smiled, satisfied. “So. Not to ask the world’s dumbest question, but since you’re both novices: you guys know conceptually how this works, right?” 

Leo raised an eyebrow at her.

“Is professor McLean about to hold a lecture on the history of snowball fights? Because I didn’t bring a notebook or do my homework,” he teased. “I’ve seen movies, Pipes. I’m not thathopeless. Besides, it’s not exactly rocket science—and I could probably figure out rocket science if I wanted to.”

“Good. Jason?”

“I mean, sort of?” He looked at her sheepishly. “I know it’s about forming snow and throwing it at each other. Not sure how it works beyond that, though. Is there a point system?”

“A point system?” Leo almost doubled over laughing. Even with his nonexistent snowball fight experience, he knew that wasn’t how it worked. “No, I’m pretty sure it’s to the death.”

“It is?” Jason looked genuinely concerned now.

“Figurative death,” Piper told him, leaning down to grab a bunch of snow to form it. “You keep throwing snowballs at each other until someone starts begging for mercy. Not at the head, though—we might gather up stones along with the snow by accident, and you’ve gotten concussed enough for two lifetimes.”

She launched the snowball she’d made for demonstrative purposes, throwing it very lightly in Jason’s direction. It only left a slight dusting of snow against his jacket before most of it dropped down, exploding into bits as it hit the ground.

“Okay. This doesn’t seem so bad,” Jason decided, but he still looked a little sheepish. “So, how do you- Uhm-”

“Just take some snow into your hand and shape it?” Leo raised an eyebrow at him. “That really doesn’t seem very hard, Superman. Piper’s right, you need to stop overthinking things so much. Just try it.”

~~~~

Five minutes later, Leo was ready to eat his words.

Jason had made one perfectly round snowball in the time it had taken Piper to make more than five.

“Does this one look okay?” he asked, holding his creation out towards Piper, clearly worried he’d get a bad grade in snowball fighting.

Unfortunately, Leo did not get to make fun of his boyfriend in this specific case. One ridiculously round snowball was still one more than Leo had managed. 

“Yeah, this isn’t going to work,” he announced, sighing. “All I’ve managed to make is slush—and not even the fun kind.” He held up the dripping, half-melted mess of snow he was holding. It was utterly impossible to turn it into any kind of shape. “Turns out I’m too hot to have snowball fights.”

Piper snorted. “You’re both disasters. Jason, you should not compress the snowball this much. It looks nice, but the outer layer is partially ice now. You could hurt someone with that.”

“Oh.” 

Jason dropped the snowball he’d made, looking bummed.

“Just take a bit of snow and press it together a good two, three times so it holds. That’s enough.” She patted his arms comfortingly. “Leo, you need heat-resistant gloves. You can get those out of your tool belt, right?”

“Huh. That might work.” He reached into his tool belt and produced a pair of welding gloves. They weren’t exactly meant for this purpose, but they did prevent him from completely melting any snow he picked up. “Alright. Yeah. That’s not so bad. Now-”

Before he could get another word out, Piper had already launched a snowball at him. 

“Less talking, more getting a move on!” she told them, preparing to toss the next one at Jason. 

“Oh, I’ll get you back for that,” Leo told her, face melting into a grin as he took his revenge.

Point for Khione, he supposed. This was fun.

~~~~

Despite their earlier claims that there wasn’t really a point system in snowball fights, Piper most definitely won. 

The welding gloves prevented Leo from melting the snow to slush, but they were shit for throwing things—which was not helped by the fact that his aim had been awful to begin with.

Jason’s aim was great, but even though he wasn’t making ice projectiles anymore, he was still much slower at forming snowballs than either of them. Worse, though—Jason made a really good target. He was the tallest, broadest one out of all of them, and unlike Leo, he was shit at dodging. Leo wondered, not for the first time, if Roman demigods generally assumed they didn’t need to dodge because they were meant to be wearing armor, or if this was an issue specific to his boyfriend.

Leo and Jason were both soaked by the end of it—Jason because of all the hits he’d taken, Leo because anything that hit him melted at an unnatural speed.

Piper was almost dry. That was just unfair.

“I think we should team up,” Leo told his boyfriend, trying to insta-dry his clothes by upping his body temperature a little. It… didn’t work that well. It mostly just melted the snow that had still been left on his clothes.

“Is that allowed?”

“All is fair in love and war, or something.” Leo grinned at him. “Just tell her you’re ready to give up.”

“I mean, I sort of am ready to give up,” his boyfriend admitted. He was shivering.

Leo winced.

“Yeah, we should get you inside.”

“What are you plotting over there?” Piper asked, clearly suspicious. She hit Leo in the shoulder with another snowball.

“Not plotting!” Leo yelled back. ��Superman is surrendering before he freezes to death.”

“Boo!” Piper yelled, but she dropped the new snowball that had somehow already made its way into her hand and walked over. “Weaklings.”

“Shut up. You’ve got practice. That’s no fair,” Leo protested, backing away as innocently as he could.

“I’m completely soaked through,” Jason told her, but he was smiling. “I had a great time, though. I’d like to do this again sometime.”

“Someone’s gotta make sure you learn how to have fun.” Piper smiled, which quickly turned into a shriek when Leo dumped the snow he’d gathered into her jacket. “Leo! Ew! Like half of that is slush!”

“Ah, sweet revenge.” He grinned. “Now we’re all equally soaked.”

She pushed him into the snow.

“Cheater! You said you were surrendering!”

“No, technically I said Jason was surrendering,” Leo clarified, laughing. He decided he might as well make the most of the opportunity he’d been given and began to moving his arms and legs like he was doing jumping jacks, trying to make a snow angel like he’d seen people do in movies. Considering the way the snow was melting against his skin, he was decently sure he was making a mud angel instead, but he didn’t mind too much. “You should have seen your face.”

Piper’s disgruntled expression quickly melted, and a moment later, all three of them were cracking up. 

“I hate to admit it, but well played.” Piper sighed, offering him a hand up despite the fact that he was dripping wet. “We should probably get inside before we belatedly fulfill Khione’s wish of turning us all into ice statues.”  ~~~~

Thirty minutes later, the three of them were sitting on the couch in fresh, dry clothes, each of them holding a cup of hot cocoa. Leo was sitting between Piper and Jason, who were leaning against him, shivering, shamelessly leeching off his warmth despite the fact that they were both wrapped in blankets.

A corny Christmas romcom Jason had wanted to watch was running on the TV. Piper was currently listing all the other snow related activities they should participate in—sledding, building snowmen, maybe ice skating.

Leo closed his eyes and did his best to memorize the moment, savoring the feeling of home.

Fourteen year old Leo couldn’t have imagined he might feel like this again one day. Homes hadn’t been a good thing for him since he’d been eight. Home had been the place he’d destroyed when he’d burnt down his mom’s machine shop. After that, he’d been through a lot of other people’shomes that had never really felt like they were his. 

Generally, the word had come to mean a place where there is no space for you.

The Waystation was starting to feel a little like what a home was supposed to be, now that he no longer had to deal with half of his heart being six feet under. But it couldn’t compare to this.

Couldn’t live up to the feeling of him sitting between his two favorite people, laughing and sharing candy. 

That was what home was to Leo. His home wasn’t a place. It was the two people who had reminded him what it felt like to be loved.

He’d endure all the cruel nine am alarms and terrible christmas movies in the world, as long as it meant he got to keep them.

[therealvinelle]

This has been picking my squishy little thought organ.

Submitted to several others for a wide range of potential awnsers

If Jalice had a kid, what are some hypothetical gifts it could have?

I could see it having the gift of giving hallucinations.

(that previous ANON got me thinking, clearly)

Because of his emotional ability--> making them believable. [Fool the emotions all else will follow.] Her visions are quite sporadic at times. ---> crafting the mental space devoted to that.

Environmental Factors---> Bella & her daughter can project, and I think environmental factors will give the gift a push to be able to be casted. INSTEAD of actually just ending up with hyperaphantasia.

"People with hyperphantasia can imagine scenes, sounds, smells, tastes, and sensations with great clarity and detail. They may also have enhanced abilities in creativity, memory, and empathy."

Alice & Bella are besties, so they'll spend a considerable amount of time together interacting. So, I think the block Renesme has on the visions will be a giant factor too.

Despite Bella and Alice just not being close it will happen anyway. Cause there's nowhere realistically for her to go.

She's stuck and Alice probably isn't going to get a vision going oh, now is the right time to leave.

Even if you could argue oh, they'll never fight. Most likely right unless we wanna go even more Au... {Which I am 100% ok with}

But I think Alice's slight harboring of resentment for Renesme for blocking her visions will be the key in the lock for this to all work out right.

She isn't going to stop blocking them. Alice already has had time to get over her gift dependency so much but like she won't do that.

Jasper's gift can't be blocked by a shield, but I imagine he's a little immune to Renesme's gift. (Realistically not...? But it's a silly little Tumblr post I don't want to think about the power scale too hard and implode.)

I was hoping you could pick up where I left off about how things realistically work in Twilight.

Besides the whole vampires have a kid despite one being infertile.

But I think this would be a hell-on-wheels problem. Cause while Jasper I'd argue! Has a more moral conscious (at least in the ways we see it.) than Alice. But they're both pretty grey.

Which means they're both pretty ruthless. Like Bella and Edward are for their child.

All i know is this offspring would have to be so lucky to not be snatched by the Volturi.

I think this kid would fare better than Renesme in the short and long term. Even if they were both hybrids. This kid would have parents that would in my opinion actually teach it more.

I think Bella and Edward don't teach Renesme. much.

I think Jasper would make sure his kid had the skills should they be needed to be used. And Alice would support this or just let it happen. I think he's a more active parent than her but that's 100% different bullshit Au type of discussion and I just needed to drop this meta off to blogs for their thoughts.

I am driving myself crazy. I would like to sleep.

Well, I'm not entirely sure how this child would come to be in the first place as Jasper and Alice can't have one.

Assuming, though, that God bestowed one upon them, I subscribe to @smallcatwoman's fellow who has the gift of seeing emotional outcomes, the child would be as delightfully alien as Alice only in a very different way (optimal future-oriented Alice versus happiest outcome-seeker Greige).

As for how the child is raised, I imagine it would have much the same upbringing as Renesmee. If Jasper and Alice are interested in teaching a child, Renesmee is right there and is, by all accounts, The Cullen Child™. They are all devoting every resource to her, raising her communnaly for all that she is officially Bella and Edward's.

A second child with a different set of parents would, if possible, be even more Cullen Communal Property than Renesmee: Bella, at least, had an interest in her child, Alice screams childfree. Oh, she'll be the cool aunt and take the kid shopping, no problem, but parenting? Motherhood?

Esme and Rosalie can do the hard parts, and Jasper and Carlisle too if they want. Alice will be pointing out that God making the child genetically hers was simply a matter of good taste, doesn't mean she should be raising the damn thing.

And the child gets to live in the shadow of Renesmee, who was wanted by her mother, the first and miraculous baby everybody and their cousin were willing to die for, and has a guy imprinted on her. Renesmee, by all accounts, would be the golden child and the other one would be... the other one.

Wasn't supposed to exist, his mother foisted him off and prefers to dress up Renesmee anyway, and his gift is only able to tell him that he can't be happy around his family, so he ignores it.

Perhaps Greige will love Renesmee, but I prefer the timeline where he resents her too much to recognise his cousin for just as unhappy as he is, and Renesmee has no idea why but only knows that she can't meaningfully connect to him.

Drama is had.

[bengiyo]

Love in Translation Ep 1 Stray Thoughts

This looked like pretty standard fare I would check out on principle and I was curious to see Offroad again since I thought he was the best performer in Our Days, but Ngern Anupart is in this and that is the only thing I care about. OGs understand.

NGERN!!!! WELCOME HOME, KING!!

Very different character. Almost didn't recognize Offroad.

We have a named Black character in a Thai BL. That's our one for the year, so I hope he's a good character.

Truly incredible how the leads are getting even more attractive in these shows. I am not immune.

Ngern's character is in a secret romance with his brother's best friend!! I am seated!!!

I do like a language-based misunderstanding, given the premise.

This is a comedy of errors and I am amused.

Very believable that two guys could reasonably watch the CCTV footage after a scuffle to see who was right.

Okay, Yang getting Puzai auto-blocked by his favorite idol is petty.

Of course Puzai has to run back to Yang for this silly reason of appealing to his idol.

Goddamn this man would have waited until he was away from Yang before throwing his business card away.

Well, things are hard for Yang right now. Thankfully, today's beverage sponsor can fix him right up.

Antoine only having chocolate syrup to put on bread and only black coffee better not be a joke 🤣

It was part of a bread sponsorship!!

This show is genuinely funny.

I really like the way this next meeting between our leads is going to happen via Odo. This doesn't feel forced even if it is contrived.

He's just gonna have a business. Just like that. Amazing.

This bit of them singing a best friend chant before smash cutting to Puzai (sounds like they're saying Pojo) alone is so funny.

Yes, let them stumble into each other again and have a pleasant exchange when they don't know they're speaking to their fast enemy. I love this.

Yes, Odo. Leave during this critical moment. You might say something reasonable that undercuts the comedy.

They're having a food fight. Oh my god

I also like that desperation is going to be a thing that keeps them together. How fascinating. Normally these shows rely on school to force people together. This path is new.

These two leaning on the anonymous encouragement they gave each other as they glare at each other... Who wrote this?... The screenwriting team is new, but they're funny!

Okay, if Puzai's assessment of these three people is accurate, these seem like solid choices at first blush. It also adds two femmes to the cast. That's encouraging!

Next week: Hopefully not misappropriation of Tammy's likeness and some classic BL moments maybe?

Holy shit this was an incredibly fun first episode! I think we really need to revisit the way we use the term "BL pulp" around here because the varying levels of production and quality are so variable now. This is the most I've genuinely laughed at a BL in a long time, and I really like the silliness of the contrivances that brought this premise together. It's just believable enough for me not to roll my eyes and have a good time. Also NGERN!!! I am looking forward to reporting back next week!

[aliceismypixie]

This has been picking my squishy little thought organ.

If Jalice had a kid, what are some hypothetical gifts it could have?

I could see it having the gift of giving hallucinations.

(that previous ANON got me thinking, clearly)

Because of his emotional ability--> making them believable. [Fool the emotions all else will follow.] Her visions are quite sporadic at times. ---> crafting the mental space devoted to that.

Environmental Factors---> Bella & her daughter can project, and I think environmental factors will give the gift a push to be able to be casted. INSTEAD of actually just ending up with hyperaphantasia.

Alice & Bella are besties, so they'll spend a considerable amount of time together interacting. So, I think the block Renesme has on the visions will be a giant factor too.

Despite Bella and Alice just not being close it will happen anyway. Cause there's nowhere realistically for her to go.

She's stuck and Alice probably isn't going to get a vision going oh, now is the right time to leave.

Even if you could argue oh, they'll never fight. Most likely right unless we wanna go even more Au... {Which I am 100% ok with}

But I think Alice's slight harboring of resentment for Renesme for blocking her visions will be the key in the lock for this to all work out right.

She isn't going to stop blocking them. Alice already has had time to get over her gift dependency so much but like she won't do that.

Jasper's gift can't be blocked by a shield, but I imagine he's a little immune to Renesme's gift. (Realistically not...? But it's a silly little Tumblr post I don't want to think about the power scale too hard and implode.)

I was hoping you could pick up where I left off about how things realistically work in Twilight.

Besides the whole vampires have a kid despite one being infertile.

But I think this would be a hell-on-wheels problem. Cause while Jasper I'd argue! Has a more moral conscious (at least in the ways we see it.) than Alice. But they're both pretty grey.

Which means they're both pretty ruthless. Like Bella and Edward are for their child.

All i know is this offspring would have to be so lucky to not be snatched by the Volturi.

I think this kid would fare better than Renesme in the short and long term. Even if they were both hybrids. This kid would have parents that would in my opinion actually teach it more.

I think Bella and Edward don't teach Renesme. much.

I think Jasper would make sure his kid had the skills should they be needed to be used. And Alice would support this or just let it happen. I think he's a more active parent than her but that's 100% different bullshit Au type of discussion and I just needed to drop this meta off to blogs for their thoughts.

I am driving myself crazy. I would like to sleep.

I think that if Jalice hypothetically had a gift, it could be be related to feel the emotions of the people had in the past/will have in the future. Considerating the fact that Renesmee has a gift pretty complicated as an hybrid, it could be possible that every gifted hybrid has a gift more complicated than a normal vampire. The kid (Jalice's) would also, probably, block their mother's power but would slowly unblock it for their mother overtime. Because somehow, they are linked considerating the fact that in SM's Twilight world, the links are pretty strong bond, related to family or.

I can say that for most part I agree with you. Seeing how Alice and Bella were during Breaking-Dawn Part 1, it was already pretty hard for them both to get along and agree due to the fact that Alice couldn't see Renesmee's nor Bella's future. As you said, it could be the key for a potential fight to happen between the two.

As for Jalice having a kid. I would agree that the kid would probably be taught more, their father was an ex-soldier and their mother would probably want them to be able to defend themselves in the future as she would not be able to see anything due to being an hybrid. However, I think that this kid would also had easier way to understand what/who they are since Renesmee would be born before them and the whole family would be ready. Therefore, everyone would already know how to deal with an hybrid kid in the house with the supernatural grow, being able to eat human food ect.

I don't know if like I correctly answer but I tried my best to fill your hunger ^^' (you got me thinking for twenty minutes there)

[hedonicghost]

i am not immune to a freaky green thing

i'm so glad you like the freaky green thing! (bonus under the cut)

real talk we're really really glad you like her!!! despite us not even posting art of her since november of last year hehe... meddoks' character (and the other tsfu chars) were a big part of our like... early-days of being an artist? heh my point is, i'm really, really glad that our furry little creatures are liked by anyone, let alone the fact that people might have favorites of the cast. it's reassuring that they're still likeable, especially when we've been having a bad art block, heh <3 thank you so much, these sorts of asks mean the world to us, even if they're just silly little things like hamberder ( btw sorry for misspelling it twice but also i think it adds to the bit :p )

[squidsandthings]

BIOLOGY???!!?!??!??!?

i have never not ever seen someone on tumblr with biology listed in their interests as a fellow biology enthusiast i demand to know more tell me more please

what kind of biology specifically?? or just in general?? is it like WOAH BIOLOGY or just haha yeah biology is cool ig (because if you can’t tell already i am very much the former biology is so awesome i am not okay)

it’s entomology for me, more specifically moths, like. aaaaa a a aaaaa a aaaaa i lovmnv them… moths….. i lovembe motjs…..

so yes SPILL BIOLOGY INFO PLEASE !! AND/OR ANYTJING ELSE YOU’D LIKE TO RANT ABOUT !! I DO NOT CARE I JUST LIKE RANTING WITH SILLY PEOPLE ON THIS SILLY SITE !!!

HIHI TY SO MUCH FOR THE ASK :DD

I love biology so much. Definitely a 'WOAH BIOLOGY' more than a "it's kinda cool ig" lol. The more I learn about biology and different fields in biology the more I fall in love with it. I just think learning the ways in which life, like, works (for lack of better phrasing) I dunno it's just so cool to learn about, and think about. All the little things that go into life.

I've always had a particular fascination with human biology. And specifically Anatomy and Physiology. As a like 1st or 2nd grader my mom got me a book which was basically very simplified anatomy and physiology and It became my personality till I started middle school. I think it's so neat to learn about something and that thing be something that's happening within you right now. One of my favorite things in my biology classes is doing labs/dissections because it's so cool to feel and touch and see the things which are actively keeping you alive. Also I'm a big fan of dendritic cells (my favorite cell <3).

I would say my interest in biology has definitely broadened in recent times. Recently I've been learning more about Ornithology. I'm trying starting bird watching and I generally think birds fucking cool as hell. I actually started learning more about Ornithology because I really like pigeons. And I wanted to learn more about birds in general, so I started watching yt videos about them and googling and now I can say that I think probably too much about Birds.

Interestingly marine biology used to be interest of mine, but it's never been my main love when it comes to biology. Which is funny since most of my online accounts are related to squid.

------------------------------------------------------------

ANYWAY THIS IS ALL BESIDES THE POINT.

the point being this gives me and excuse to talk about my true love in life...the immune system and specifically dendritic cells. I. am. so. normal. about these antigen presenting baddies. I fuckin love them. The immune system has always been the most interesting system to me as someone who spent most of their childhood in a battle to the death with their immune system. So anyway lemme tell you about my favorite cell in the human body: Dendritic Cells/DC's

(pls note i'm by no means and expert and while I like to talk about this stuff I might get stuff wrong. I just think its all neat, but my research is mostly googling and the occasional book I find on the topic, so take all of this with a grain of salt)

So the immune system. It's pretty cool. Helps keep you alive and stuff. Roughly speaking there's two sorta categories in your immune system. Your innate and your adaptive immune system.

Innate: I like to think of the innate immune system like a safety net. Generalized, Broad, but it does what it's trying to do well. It's your first line of defense. Your skin and mucous membranes are part of this, but so are cells like macrophages which can eat pathogens. Its focused on blocking and destroying, but sometimes this doesn't work and the pathogen works too fast or goes undected for too long. Then you need something more specialized to help out.

Adaptive: This is the special ops of ur immune system. They target pathogens directly by identifying them and using that to target them. Since it needs to take the time to identify the pathogen tho, it's slower, which is why the fast but generalized innate response is also important. This part of ur immune system is also why vaccines work. Certain cells in this part of ur immune system have the ability to basically remember these past infections. So next time you get sick the adaptive response can kick in right away.

So where do dendritic cells fit into this???

IM SO GLAD YOU ASKED. So, Dendritic cells are actually kinda both part of the innate an adaptive response. How? Well, I'll tell you.

So dendritic cells hang out across ur body and act like immune system watchtowers. So when a pathogen comes strolling in looking to cause trouble ur innate immune response is going to (usually) start giving it some pushback. With things like Macrophages (that eat pathogens). But as I mentioned before the innate response while fast, is nonspecific. The adaptive response is what can target pathogens directly. But how does the adaptive response even get started? Does the innate response have something to like go tell the adaptive response "Hey this is what we're dealing with wake up and go fight it"? YES. And that's the dendritic cell.

So Dendritic cells are innate immune response cells which engulf pathogens and present them on the outside of their cell membrane. Once they've done that they can actually inform the immune response against those pathogens.

How do they do this?

Why T and B cells ofc!

So once the dendritic cell has got all the details on the pathogen it travels to ur lymph tissue and activates the adaptive immune cells there. Informing the immune response based on the antigen it's presenting.

These funky antigen presenting cells are responsible for bridging the gap between your immune responses and also help in maintaining ur immune system's memory.

alright maybe you don't see how cool they are. I get it. lemme give you an example of why they're SO important. :D

I'm going to be discussing HIV. As many people know HIV attacks the immune system. Most notably through T-Cells, but also through Dendritic Cells.

You see when the HIV virus enters the body Dendritic cells are going to usually be one of the first immune cells it interacts with. Normally the Dendritic cell would take down virus and start an adaptive immune response, however the HIV virus has a way to take over Dendritic cells using their ability to travel to cell to quickly infect the adaptive immune cells the Dendritic cell normally actives. This allows the virus to more quickly decimate an immune system. The Dendritic Cells being compromised decimating much of the adaptive immune response.

Does that example kinda highlight my point?

I hope so.

But yeah these bad boy are fucking awesome and more people should be aware of them. I think they're rad.

Hope that wasn't too long of a rant...

ty again for the ask and giving me an excuse to talk about my favorite cell. :D

[creedslove]

LOVE LOVE LOVE HOW UR BUILDING UP THE PLOT!!!!

Loved part 3 so much!!!!!! <333

I just hope you don’t rush with the story, you’re an amazing writer I am so impressed, I usually only see smut or the storyline doesn’t resonate or feels forced. The fact that for once you’re giving so much thought into this, you’re building the anticipation, you have gotten us rooting for the reader, even if you write 100 parts of the story I know it’ll all be amazing because you’re great at delivering !!

For a long time I was looking for a fic with Pedro x reader but writers only choose his characters from shows/movies. I wonder what made you think to start writing about him and not his characters?

Take care writer, you’re putting amazing work out here, we love uuuuu <3

🤍🩶🤍🩶🤍

thank you so much anon, your words are motivating and really sweet! ❤️💖

I don't think I'll rush any chapters I mean, all the chapters were absolutely not planned, I wrote Betrayed as an one shot but people got into it and asked for a part two, which brought a part three, then part four and five (that's being written right now) I have absolutely no idea how many chapters we still have ahead, I just hope I won't go into any writer's block because I'm really enjoying this story and the ideas come naturally and when they don't, I get lots of amazing anon suggestions to work on, so I feel really lucky, to see people are actually invested.

I'm happy you are enjoying it, when I write a story, I try to write something interesting it would catch my attention and I would read it if I someone else had written it, you know what I mean? And I've always loved angst with happy endings, but I like the build up more than the ending when it's done properly and I noticed there's a lot Pedro stories that are rushed to the happy ending, which I don't blame because honestly who wouldn't want to live happily ever after with that man lmao and he is all the time a ray of sunshine to reader which I also enjoy because it brings us comfort when we read it but I thought to myself: what if he is just a normal guy who screws up like everyone else and is too stubborn to admit it? And people enjoyed that portrait! And we all project ourselves into reader, just like I said in another ask, in my mind reader is me just like she is you when you reader and so on, so we honestly just root for ourselves to be strong enough to fend for ourselves no matter how hot Pedro is while breaking our heart 😂😂😂

And the main reason why I began writing about Pedro is because I got into him because of him and not his characters. I had never watched anything he was on and I always saw people gushing about him on Twitter but never got the fuss about it, until about a month or so when whenever I logged on Instagram random pictures or reels of him would show up in my suggestions. I would usually ignore them until I came across that one where he talks about how people usually pronounce 'Pedro' and then he tells the interviewer his full name, using his beautiful accent and as I study Spanish I just LOVED the sound of that. Then other videos of him would appear and I would send them to my friend who really loves him because it reminded me of her. So I went from this guy isn't that ugly to he's not ugly at all to holy shit he's very handsome.

But the cherry on top was about three weeks ago I was going through a rough time where my immune system wasn't great or whatever and I was constantly sick, I had been sick for over a month before that and each week I would have a different problem lol and that week i was again sick and it just drained me emotionally because i was feeling so weak and all the antibiotics I took made me feel physically bad as well and my work schedule was hectic as always, long story short I was a walking corpse that week until I began dreaming about him at night.

The first time I dreamed about Pedro, it was silly but also really sweet, I dreamed I was at the mall, running some errands and with my headphones on, then the song 'Otro día que va' by RBD began playing and I sang along to it and it caught his attention because it was in Spanish so he made small talk and we began chatting, then he invited me for lunch and it was adorable because it was kinda a lunch day. So when I woke up I felt so happy and comforted about the dream and the following nights I also dreamed about him, he was always so sweet in flirty in my dreams and we spoke a lot of Spanish that spiced up things a little bit lol and by the end of the week I already had a massive crush on him, lol

But I wrote for one of his characters: Javier Peña because he makes me feel things™ and I'll probably write more when inspiration comes, just like I'll probably write for Joel Miller in the future because he also makes me feel things™ but so far, my main focus is nuestro dulce pedrito porque lo amo 💖

Thanks a lot anon, your ask was amazing and don't forget the only reason I write it's because of you all and how amazing and support of my work you all are!

❤️❤️❤️

[thatrandomlemononyourcounter1]

imo Quinn was really given gods hardest battles as an empath because like if Sophie was made into an empath she would have crashed out as soon as she manifested like. it's presumed (basically canon) that empaths can not only tell what others are feeling (like they can feel if someone is being sincere) but they feel what the other is feeling as well (like Keefe ending up laughing and crying when he manifested because he was experiencing others' emotions so intensely)

which, as an ability (even in the original series!!!!!), is like...holy shit. How do you even go out in public ever again. especially at foxfire where you're surrounded by hundreds of other prodigies all just feeling stuff?? and do not get me started on being in public spaces in foxfire during stressful events like finals or midterms if I was an empath I would curl up in a bathroom stall and never come out again ever. And according to Keefe, human emotions are a lot LOT stronger even to a really *experienced* empath (and experience means he has been an empath for longer and has been trained as one for longer) who KNOWS what certain emotions feel like, like happiness or anger as a spike of adrenaline and probably hundreds of other emotions (would dread or anticipation feel like you're slowly suffocating? would impatience make it seem like the entire world is slowing down around you? no one knows). Even to Keefe, with we can presume a lot of training, who knows that x feeling is happiness and y feeling is sadness, being around humans is really really hard. which means for Quinn who has not been trained, she's just feeling Stuff™️ sometimes and no one can tell her why (she's no doubt figured out that they're emotions but seriously the way Shannon wrote empaths they must be immune to pain by now bc holy shit). And if we say that something like fear or impending doom (/lh) is like a sort of pain in your chest where writers sometimes write that your heart is sinking in your chest..like I am genuinely giving Quinn a standing ovation (my ass would have googled the symptoms and thought I was having a heart attack ngl).

which is to say oh my god how did Quinn make it through the first six years after manifesting like. she may not have manifested as many abilities as Sophie but imagine if the black swan chose to wait bc if she could master control of her empathy she would be better prepared for other abilities..but like living in the human world especially after just manifesting at SIX YEARS OLD would have felt like actually dying. in my opinion she has it harder than Sophie bc at least sophies physical pain is mostly affecting her head but feelings like adrenaline, which isn't exactly pain but could be if there was enough of an adrenaline-fueled emotion, would affect Quinn throughout her entire body.

and that's not even considering the fact that she can read emotions from a really far distance...Quinn Parker tell me how you survive I direly need a YouTube tutorial stat /silly

seriously though I applaud her strength. ik her most sensitive flaw is that she's useless ability wise compared to Sophie but endurance wise she is probably the strongest of the gang which is like!!! Yes!!! she is probably the most useful person in the gang in that regard!! I absolutely love characters whose strengths that aren't the same but compliment each other!!!!!!

(sorry for the ramble that turned into an entire essay I have become quite obsessed with your rewrite)

(more asks are coming tho)

(be prepared /silly)

-📄

OKAY I WAS SO EXCITED WHEN I SAW THIS IN MY INBOX

SO ACTUALLY HER BECOMING NUMB IS A PROBLEM LATER ON!

in fact she has to try a little bit harder, even in the beginning to read people's emotions because she's been blocking them out for so long. For the longest time, this girl had mood swings that tore her apart. She would come home from school feeling mellow, and then come home to her parents fighting and her mood would be ruined and she'd sit in her room and like. cry. (mood)

I feel like even though her and Keefe consistently beef (in like a slightly silly way) they also bond over how stressful it is to be an Empath. Like feeling other people's emotions is HARD!!

Quinn has definitely had moments where she stopped in the street and actually thought that her life was over and that this was where she died. Eventually she figured out that she was feeling people's emotions, and with Sophie's help, was able to differentiate them a little bit, but like you said, sometimes she just. felt things. And she didn't know what they were, except for the fact that it hurt.

I LOVE YOUR DESCRIPTIONS OF THE EMOTIONS AND HONESTLY I MIGHT STEAL/BORROW A FEW OF THEM

Quinn also like (in my canon) has ADHD. So emotions like, for example, adrenaline, make her body go even crazier than normal. So while she normally is already jittery and kind of shaky, adrenaline amps that up to 100. During tests at school, she used to ask to take them in the hallway just because all the nerves in the room were making her so nauseous.

Quinn is honestly not even sure how she's made it this long after all the shit she goes through (the shit that I put her through cough cough) but like I'm sure she'd appreciate a YouTube tutorial as well because like she's just slugging her way through life rn, trying to not die from the overwhelming amount of emotions at any given time. Once she gets into Empathy training, it starts getting easier, but in the first book, it's a little bit of an issue that she's showing signs of starting to go numb, just from all the chaos and craziness. Like, obviously the Black Swan has protocols that they put into her genes that kind of help prevent that from happening, but they didn't really account for the fact that Quinn had to deal with hormonal teenagers and an alcoholic father on the daily. Like the amount of shit this girl had to feel every day is insane.

I HONESTLY MIGHT USE THAT LATER (the whole 'she's the most enduring of everyone' :DD) cause that's honestly so true. She's been through SO MUCH and this is before the trauma really even began.

I LOVE YOU 📄 ANON

Do not ever apologize for dumping an essay into my ask box because I LOVE reading them :DD

[mathematurgist]

I read a piece about how the original Tarrasque can be defeated by a level 1 Aarocockra cleric in a 1v1 combat, I thought that was silly and decided to give this monster its legendary strength back. But that was not enough, the monster still had holes in it's stat block, and so I have finally returned to redo the block. [Changelog]

Changed Magic Resistance for Limited Magic Immunity, from the Rakshasa, as the Tarrasque is famed for its Resistance against magic.

Changed the Move legendary action to full speed rather than halve speed.

Gave the Tarrasque a burrowing speed of 40 ft. as the lore suggests.

Gave the Tarrasque immunity to acid damage, which will be important later for the Regeneration.

Gave the Tarrasque immunity to exhaustion, which is backed by the lore in its relentless rampage.

Gave the Tarrasque Troll regeneration, which shuts down if the Tarrasque takes acid or fire damage. This is to keep in the lore that this creature is immortal and unstoppable by normal means. This creature can be stopped with a wish spell (DM's discretion about the DC) to shut down its immunities. The hit point regain I set to the CR of the creature rounded up to the nearest 10.

Made the Tarrasque's weapon attacks magical so that it does not lose a one on one encounter with a Clay Golem.

Gave the Tarrasque a colossal AoE breath attack, this is to give the Tarrasque options to fight at range (in exchange for using all of its attacks and with a low recharge).

Increased the number of legendary resistances to 5.

In the previous statblock people were concerned about how to defeat this monstrosity. There are ways, for example if you reduce it to less than 100 HP then a simple Power Word Kill will end the encounter, there are certain Sorcerers who bypass the Fire immunity condition (thus shutting down the regeneration, hence why I left those lines in). I wanted the Tarrasque to be a force of nature the likes of which no army could stand against and I have felt that I have encapsulated that in this statblock.

I used tetra-cube for the creation of this statblock and I am very grateful for their tools.

[heyyyharry]

Happier

(inspired by happier by Olivia Rodrigo)

Word count: 2.4k

I'm selfish, I know, I can't let you go So find someone great, but don't find no one better I hope you're happy, but don't be happier

Part 1: Drivers License

Part 2: Deja Vu

A/N: I edited the original lyrics to match the POV :)

.

.

.

Harry had come up with a thousand scenarios of how this day would play out. Actually, he’d been thinking of this day since the moment he’d received the news. He didn’t dare to hope that she’d say yes to coming back for a sequel. He’d been sure that they would write her character off, give a lame excuse for how his love interest could not make a return and make his character forget about her completely to move on with a new girl in town. It would have been great if it was that easy in real life. Once someone was written off the script, they were gone for good. Real-life relationships were not that simple. Goodbye didn’t mean ‘never see you again’. You would still share the same friend circle and social bubbles, and it was worse when you two worked in the same industry. Harry didn’t know how he’d lasted a year without running into her, not since the Grammys.

“Didn’t you two date?”

“No.” Harry shook his head, but his eyes stayed glued on Y/N from across the room. She wasn’t looking his way, too busy saying hello to everyone else. “No,” he repeated, more to himself than to his co-star. “We didn’t.”

“But she wrote an entire album about you,” said the other twin. What was her name again? Lulu?

“Luna!” cried her sister, Lex. “You can’t ask him that!”

“No, it’s okay,” Harry said with a tight smile, slightly annoyed by the blonde twins, but he didn’t want to seem like an ass on the first day of filming. “And I don’t know if it was for me. You should ask Y/N.”

“Ask me what?”

Harry flinched when he looked up and saw Y/N padding towards them. She hugged the twins, who seemed way too excited. Harry guessed they were Y/N’s fans. They gave off crazy fangirl vibes, probably just pretending not to know the drama to interrogate him. He couldn’t blame them for assuming he was the villain and definitely could not blame Y/N for portraying him as one. It was more important that he knew who he was and how much he had changed since his last relationship. Maybe they could finally be friends.

“Were they bothering you?” Y/N asked him once the twins had left.

Harry nodded. “They’re your friends?”

“Oh, I met them last year on tour. I’m surprised you don’t know them. They were on Disney.”

“I don’t watch Disney,” Harry admitted with a smile. “Well, not today’s Disney.”

“Understandable.” Y/N nodded and bit her lip. She seemed guarded with her straight back and hands hidden behind her. She eyed him up and down, quite subtle yet noticeable. “How have you been?”

“Pretty good,” he said, nodding slowly. “You?”

“Yeah, but mostly tired because of tour.”

“You’re done?”

“Yup, last night was the last show.”

“Nice.”

Y/N raised an eyebrow. “Nice?”

Harry blinked. “Did I say something wrong?”

“No.” Y/N giggled. “You still sound very...you.”

“Well, shouldn’t I?”

“Yeah, you should. But it’s been a year so…I mean, you haven’t changed much.”

“Right,” he said lowly, his eyes falling to his feet. Harry supposed he should say something else, perhaps bringing up another random topic to discuss, but all he could think about was what had happened between them. Things had been messy, hadn’t they? How could they go back to before that? Before her first song about him. Before he’d chosen someone else over her.

Or he could talk about her new relationship. She’d been in a happy relationship for almost six months, right? No wait, hadn’t they broke up two weeks ago? He wasn’t sure because he hadn’t been catching up. If they’d broken up, he’d sound like an ass to even mention her ex’s name. He should just stay quiet.

“I’ll see you later?” she said, gesturing at her stylist who was waiting by the door.

Harry could ask her right now -- the reason she’d agreed to film the sequel to their first movie together. He’d heard from a very reliable source that she’d specifically asked her agent to decline any project that he was in. So did this mean they were good? That she didn’t hate him anymore? He could have gathered his courage and got the answer right then…

“Yeah, see you.”

...but he didn’t.

And so she gave him a smile and a little wave, then happily returned to her stylist.

.

.

.

“See you tomorrow, Y/N!”

“See you, Annie!” Y/N said as she put the rest of her things into her tote bag. Her new driver had got her schedule mixed up, and so she had to wait here for another half an hour. She was in no rush. It had been a light first day, and she’d had a fun time getting to know the new cast members and catching up with old friends.

She sat on the sofa in the lobby, legs crossed, texting her best friend about her day. She’d purposely left out the short off-screen conversation with Harry, and her best friend didn’t even bother to ask. In their world, he didn’t exist, and his name was censored in every conversation like a curse word that was even worse than ‘cunt’. Nevertheless, she didn’t hate him anymore. She was doing just fine on her own, being busy with her career, and she’d been in a happy relationship after her fall out with him.

She and the guy, a model, had broken up two weeks ago due to long distance and some differences that they could not change. They had ended on good terms and decided to stay friends. They said you could only stay friends with your ex when you still had feelings for each other, or you had never loved each other that much in the first place. For her, it was probably the latter. Her previous relationship had been more platonic than romantic, apparently. So she had nothing but the best to say about him.

As she was going through her camera roll, just reminiscing about the past, she heard footsteps approaching and looked up to find Harry. He offered a smile and gestured to the spot beside her on the sofa. “May I sit here? My ride is late.”

“Yeah, sure.” She hurriedly scooted over.

“Good job today,” he said. “You were great.”

“Thanks, so were you.” She smiled, and they both looked away at the same time. This was so awkward. She hated small talk. She’d never had to have small talk with Harry. Conversations with him used to be so easy and natural and silly. Whatever this was, it wasn’t them.

“Can we just be normal?”

At first, Y/N thought she’d been the one who’d said it, so when she realised it’d been Harry, she was speechless.

He swallowed and sat a bit straighter, still not looking at her. “I don’t want us to be weird and awkward.”

“Okay,” she said.

He cleared his throat. “Wanna try again?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Okay, not to sound like an ass but when Joey kept forgetting his lines, I was so pissed off, I could throw a chair at the wall.”

“Right?!” exclaimed Y/N, feeling free to have finally broken out of her shell. “Like, he doesn’t even have many lines. I know he’s new but damn...you can’t get far if you don’t learn your goddamn lines.”

Harry shook with laughter. “Oh God, we sound like dicks, don’t we?”

“Maybe.” Y/N laughed, covering her mouth. “But you know what? We can’t be nice in this industry. It’s impossible.”

“Shhh, if someone heard this, we would be into big trouble.”

“Oh please, I’ve had worse articles written about me than ‘Y/N speaks facts about her lazy co-star’.”

Harry tossed his head back and cackled. “The worst one I’ve got this week was ‘Harry Styles hates therapists.’”

“What?!” Y/N gasped. “No way! That’s so stupid!”

“Right?” Harry rolled his eyes. “I could get all my therapists to speak up for me but I’m kinda immune to bullshit now.”

“Therapists? Like plural?”

“Yeah, one in every city.”

“Damn.”

“Yeah.”

Y/N rubbed her hands onto her legs. “Rough year?”

Harry’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as he leaned back. “You have no idea.” Then he swept his hair out of his eyes, sucked in a breath, and finally looked at her. “I wish I could have talked to you, though.”

She bit her tongue, knowing what she was about to say next would disappoint her best friend so much, but she had to. “So do I.”

Harry looked taken aback before his lips curled into a smile. “It’s silly, isn’t it? I haven’t talked to you in a year, and I feel like I know everything that’s happened to you except that I don’t.”

What he’d just said might make no sense for most people, but Y/N knew exactly what he meant. She nodded and wetted her lip. “You only know as much as everyone else does.”

“Yeah, I got updates on you from the news and our friends.”

“Same.” Y/N smiled back. “I hate how they write articles about your new haircut but not mine.”

“I like your new hair colour.”

“Thanks. I like your new car.”

Then they both burst out laughing. It was fun and also a little bit strange that Y/N didn’t feel the same anxiety talking to him as she used to. It must be because they had grown and were now meeting again as better people.

“Damn, my ride's here,” Y/N said as she read the text from her driver. “I gotta go now.”

“Oh, okay.” Harry stood up and followed Y/N to the entrance. “Hey, just wondering--”

“Yeah?”

“Am I...am I still blocked?” He looked a bit flustered as she tilted her head and squinted her eyes. “On your phone. Because I remember you having my number blocked--”

“I unblocked you on your birthday.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah.” Y/N shrugged. “I should’ve sent you a happy birthday text but...I didn’t want your girlfriend to get the wrong ideas.”

“My ex.”

“Yeah, I know.”

They smiled at each other one last time before saying goodbye. Y/N knew it was silly, but she was hoping he would go after her.

Ding.

A notification popped up when she was in the car. She was almost home, and it was from Harry’s number. He’d sent her a link with a message that said, “Hope you like it :)”.

Curious, she tapped on it and was directed to an audio file titled ‘Track 5’. The upload date was last year. About two weeks after their short conversation at the Grammys.

Hurriedly, she fumbled inside her bag for her iPods and put it on before she pressed play.

“Hey, Jeff, I couldn’t sleep so I wrote this song. Listen and let me know if it should go on the album.”

Then came the piano intro. It sounded good, so Y/N wondered how it hadn’t ended up on his last album.

But when he started to sing...

We ended a while ago Your friends are mine, you know, I know You've moved on, found someone new One more guy who brings out the better in you

And I thought my heart was detached From all the sunlight of our past But he’s so nice, he’s so funny Does he mean you forgot about me?

Oh, I hope you're happy But not like how you were with me I'm selfish, I know, I can't let you go So find someone great, but don't find no one better I hope you're happy, but don't be happier

And does he tell you you’re the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen? An eternal love bullshit he might not even mean Remember when you were with me I meant it when you heard it first from me

And now I'm pickin' him apart Like cuttin' him down will make you miss my wretched heart But he’s charming, he looks kind He probably gives you butterflies

I hope you're happy But not like how you were with me I'm selfish, I know, I can't let you go So find someone great, but don't find no one better

I hope you're happy I wish you all the best, really Say you love him, baby Just not like you loved me And think of me fondly when your hands are on him I hope you're happy, but don't be happier

The song was for her. He’d written it when her new relationship had gone public. Y/N sat there, staring blankly ahead until the honking of a car tore open her inner peace, and reality came crashing back in. The driver dropped her off at her house. Instead of going inside, she stood on her front steps and replayed the song one more time. When it ended, she decided to text him: Why didn’t this make it to the album?

She didn’t know where he was now, but it showed ‘typing’ in less than a second, as if he’d been waiting in their chat since he’d sent that link.

You would’ve hated me, Y/N.

True, she replied. Still, I would’ve loved the song lowkey. And added, I love it btw.

He took so long to type that it was driving her crazy. She flopped down on the concrete stair with her phone clutched in her hands, her heart thundering against her ribcage. Anxiety popped like a balloon when his message appeared: Were you happier?

She reread it again and again.

No.

I wasn’t either, he responded. I kept getting deja vu.

Ha, nice reference.

That song is my guilty pleasure. Love listening to you roasting me on loop.

That last message made Y/N bury her face into her palm and giggle like a fool. She thought for a second and wrote: I could come roast you in person now if that’s what you prefer. I think we’ve never had a proper roasting.

Can we meet, Y/N? Or are you busy now?

No, not busy.

Great, I’ll pick you up.

Just tell me where, she responded with a smile on her face. I got my drivers license now :)

[iwaisuke]

confessions; but not remembering it

ft. kita shinsuke, sakusa kiyoomi x sick fem!reader

genre: fluff

masterlist

a/n: this has been sitting in my drafts for a while and then i rushed bc i was getting tired 🙃 also. sakusa's is a little ooc. sorry ab that

-» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

» the clean yet musty smell of rain filled the gym as the boys practiced. it was a surprisingly humid and rainy spring day today here in the country side of hyogo

» "achoo" you had been sneezing and coughing all day. you also had a terrible headache but took some medicine to see if it would help. the spring allergies really getting to you

» you didnt reay have the time to be worrying about yourself. As a 2nd year manager of the inarizaki team, (recommend by suna) and the boys working so hard practicing for nationals there was no way you'd let this little cold get in the way. you had to work just as hard as everyone else!

» "hold on, im about to hang up your jerseys to dry"

» "i got you guys some fresh towels!"

» "i can run and grab that coach. im headed that way anyways"

» the coach called for a short break to rest up for a bit. everyone was sore and exhausted from practicing every day. "here. i filled your water bottles up!" handing them to all the boys. "y/n you're all wet" akagi sounded concerned.

» "hm? oh its alright. I'll dry off in a minute. i took the shortcut to the drinking fountain to refill your waterbottles instead of taking the long way" you nonchalantly said. "so you ran through the rain like an idiot?" suna threw a clean towel over your damp hair and ruffled it. "suna!! stop!! you're gonna ruin my hair"

» "like i said. its alright" you reassured the boys.

» kita, on the other hand had noticed your fatigue. although he wasnt as perceptive on peoples feeling and thoughts as well as others, he could easily pick up signs like yours. he admired you dearly for how hard you always work for the team. how you willingly did anything to make them smile. how you always put others first before yours. needless to say, he had a bit of a crush on you.

» "l/n san. i think you should take a break too. there's no need for you to be running around for us while we're resting" kita assured you. "i still have a few things left on my list to do.. but afterwards I'll take a break!" kita let out a sigh. you were stubborn sometimes and kita knew you were the kind of person to not stop until you're finished.

» "I'll be right back. i gotta grab the laundry"

» making an excuse to leave, your heart was beating fast. you knew kita's words were the kind he'd say to anyone, but it made your heart feel fuzzy when he'd look out for you.

» the stone cold captain who you thought he was, actually was so kind. he was just a little awkward like you, and a little blunt with what he said sometimes. but you learned the great qualities he carries and how much he actually cares about others well being. he was a hard worker and you couldnt help but absentmindedly fall for the captain.

» running up the stairs to the second floor of the gym, you felt a shift in your step. head becoming dizzier than it was just 5 minutes ago. legs trembling, you started falling before feeling a presence behind.

» kita's arm wrapped around your waist, supporting you in efforts to not letting you fall over. "i told you to rest l/n san" kita said sternly. "you wont benefit anyone if you keep overworking like this."

» you knew kita was right, but you really didnt want to rest knowing you'll be letting the team down by not working hard.

» "i promise I'll rest as soon as im done with this one thing" pleading with kita. he let out a sigh, knowing you really wouldnt until you did finish so he allowed you to do so.

» finishing grabbing all of the dry jerseys and bringing them downstairs to pass out to everyone, you didnt really notice atsumu and osamu spiking volleyballs at each other until aran yelled

» "y/n! watch out!" honestly, you were too tired to move out of the way so you figured, it do be like that sometimes, and allowed the ball to hit you.

» or... so you had planned the ball to hit you.

» kita stood in front, blocking the impact of the spike that you had prepared yourself for. there was agitation in kita's eyes. more than you usually noticed when then twins were miss behaving. concern washing over, he looked you straight in the eyes

» "... is there something wrong kita san?" lifting up his hand to your forehead, he let out a sigh. "why didnt you tell me earlier you had a fever", then walking over to the coach meanwhile atsumu and osamu come over to apologise for being reckless.

» "get your stuff. we're going home" kita said bluntly.

» "huh? but practice is-"

» "please l/n san. for me"

» kita would only take yes for an answer this time. no if's ands or buts. so here you were, walking home with kita. only the sound of raindrops hitting your shared umbrella being heard.

» muscles starting to ache a little more and your legs becoming more tired than they were when you left the gym, you began to walk a little slower every step

» "get on my back l/n" "its ok kita san, i can walk. its already enough that you're walking me home" "i didnt ask if you wanted to. im telling you to"

» you couldnt tell if it was the fever that made your face warmer or if it was kita's words. nonetheless, you got on kita's back. he was a lot stronger than he looked and you couldnt help but stifen at being so close to your own crush like this.

» "relax. I'll make sure you get home." he reassured. you leaned into his back, warmth seeping in, your eyes began to feel heavy.

» "kita san" "yes?" "thank you for always watching out for me"

» a comfortable silence was met as the sound of rain filled your ears.

» "kita san" "hm?" "did you know..." your voice softened "i like you a lot kita san"

» did he hear you correctly? if he wasnt paying attention he wouldve missed what you had said, being drowed out through the pitter patter of water. now his heart thumping louder than ever before.

» "l/n san-" he was about to go on but was met with the gentle rise and fall of your chest and the soft snores of you on his back, knocked out from exertion. kita let out a light chuckle, finally relieved you were resting.

» you had missed the next day of school, but when you came back the whole volleyball team bombarded you with love.

» "WE'RE A FAILURE TO NOT NOTICE YOU FEELING SICK" atsumu cried. "how could we let our one and only precious manager get ill for taking care of us" akagi, clearly dissapointed in himself. "please let us know when we can take care of you too y/n" aran said.

» "its no big deal. really!" waving your hands in defense. "it was just a small cold. but i do have a question though"

» all the boys gathered around to hear what you had to say

» "how did i get home?? i really dont remember what happened after i almost got hit by atsumu"

» it shocked the guys honestly. you genuinely didnt remember a single thing due to your fever. "wait? you don't remember kita taking you home?" suna replied, your face becoming red. "k-kita san took me home-?" "yah. he left in the middle of practice to do so" osamu added.

» immediately, you got up to find the captain that apparently took you home the other day. he was in the storage closet cleaning and grabbing the equipment for todays practice.

» "kita san" "oh. l/n. glad you're feeling better" his smile brightened the musty closet. "about that, im sorry for troubling you and having you take me home the other day. i honestly dont remember what happened after i almost got hit by atsumu. my mind was really fuzzy that day, but im truly thankful for you going out of your way for me. it really means a lot"

» kita was dumbfounded. you really dont remember? "no need to apologize l/n. it was my responsibility as a captain. and afterall, what good would i be if i couldnt even take care of the person who means the most to me"

» your heart raced. 'person who means the most to me' ? cheeks blushing a rosy pink, you were internally thanking the musty store room from being dim.

» with arms full of equipment, kita walked by you and stopped.

» "by the way l/n san. did you know?"

» ears perking up at the vague yet familiar line

» "i like you a lot too l/n san"

» now we all know sakusa HATES germs and for the past week and a half, he's been telling you to keep up with washing your hands, wearing a mask at all times even when you eat omi it doesnt work like that. pls especially since you are prone to getting sick easily no matter how hygenic you are. your immune system just hated you. PERIODT

» you remembered sakusa scolding you for running out of hand sanitizer and then the next day you were out of commission. bed ridden with laryngitis, cough, slight fever, the whole works. it was like your body was making fun of you or something

» you texted komori, asking him to take notes in class for you and relay homework information while you were at home resting up. but there was one request you had and made komori PROMISE.

» DO NOT TELL SAKUSA YOU GOT SICK

» "he's probably gonna notice your absence y/n. he'll find out about it either way"

» "well if you dont tell him then he wont know. its not like he even cares about where i am like that"

» "thats what you might think. but i know he's gonna say something i can garuntee it"

» the next day at school, sakusa did notice your presence missing. it was quieter not having a 3rd person in the group of friends. not having you around to talk to him when komori was gone.

» pulling out his phone to text you, he asked where you were that day.

» "on a family trip :D !!! forgot to tell you, but I'll tell you all about it when i come back!" you wrote, attaching an old selfie of a different trip you went on to make it more believable.

» you had hoped this silly cold would get better in a day, but soon that day turned into 2 and then 3 and then 4... you pretty much missed the whole week of school at that point

» Friday rolled around and komori was on his phone all day. sakusa noticed his cousin fidget in his chair more than usual and it irked him to see him like that

» "what's with you today?" one eye raised, sakusa finally asked. "uhhh nothing really" komori wasnt very good at keeping secrets lets just start off with that, but he was trying his best.

» "well clearly somethings wrong. you're fidgeting." "well haven't you noticed somethings been different all week?" komori hinted

» sakusa sat there in thought. nothing's been different? he ate the same breakfast he usually does every morning. all his studies have been well. there were no tests this week so there was no reason to be anxious like komori was and even if there was, he would've done well anyways.

» "just tell me what it is." sakusa was starting to get annoyed. "y/n..." komori started. "y/n?" "do you know where she's been this week?"

» did you not tell komori about your family trip? you usually told komori everything, but then again you didn't tell him either until he asked you about it.

» "she said shes on a trip?" he nonchalantly said. komori's eyes started watering. "A TRIP TO THE HOSPITAL THATS WHAT IT IS" he blurted out. komori didnt mean to let it slip , he was just so worried about your well being.

» "hospital?? what are you talking about. did she get injured on her trip?" "no omi. shes been sick all week and her mom just texted me saying she went to the hospital today because shes had a fever for 3 days straight. there is no family trip"

» sakusa's heart shattered. you were sick and didnt even tell him?

» before both he and komori knew it, his legs were running faster to get to the hospital than he had ever imagined he could ever run.

» and there you were. fast asleep in a bed with an IV drip. your face flushed, forehead sweaty and shallow breaths escaping your chapped lips. you were a hot mess but sakusa didnt care. stepping to your bedside to greet your mother she explained to him that she had to go to work and asked if he could watch over you until she gets back.

» sakusa said yes without even hearing the whole thing. his heart and mind saying yes to whatever it took to get you to feel better.

» gosh how he hated hospitals, but what he hated even more was the fact that you were in the hospital and he didnt even know.

» the doctor came in for their evening round and ensured sakusa that you were indeed getting better! your fever had broken not too long ago and your body was working extra hard to heal itself up!

» "is there anything i can do to help?" sakusa asked. he felt helpless in this situation just watching your face distort in uncomfort every now and then, and coughing your lungs out.

» patting sakusa's shoulder, the doctor told him that just being here for you is enough. "you gotta be a strong boyfriend for her alright son? she'll be able to go home tomorrow first thing in the morning if her fever doesnt come back"

» sakusa slumped in his chair at your bedside, the doctors words ringing through his head. 'boyfriend huh?' he thought to himself. "if i was her boyfriend..." he whispered to himself, "i would be a failure for not even knowing my girl was sick..."

» to kiyoomi, you were beautiful. even now in this sad state you were in. deep down he locked these growing feelings he had for you inside of him because he always felt like you were a better match with someone else and after this stunt you pulled of lying to him about going on a family trip, it only made him feel worse.

» it was now night time and you finally began to stir in your sleep, the fever finally gone. sakusa reached out to move some hair that was stuck to your face, fingers tracing the outline of your jaw. your eyes slowly opened and met with his dark orbs.

» "y/n?" "saku- wait this is just a dream. omi wouldn't be here. he hates hospitals" you let out a forced laugh and then a sigh through your sore throat.

» you reached out to sakusa's hands that were resting on the side of your bed. "omi would never let me hold his hand because he'd say im passing germs to him so hopefully dream omi wont be the same" you were aimlessly talking to yourself, not even realizing that this really wasnt a dream.

» he squeezed your hand in return. hoping that you wouldnt let go any time soon. a funny smile appeared on your face just at the thought of him. "even if you're stupid for not realizing how much i like you... i cant wait to see you again omi" you whispered before falling asleep again.

» sakusa didnt know what to do. he sat there frozen in his chair. it was his first time hearing you call him omi. heck. you literally just confessed to the boy. his brain was running wild. groaning in distress he let go of your hand to step out for a breath of fresh air now that you were back asleep.

» it was 5am and your mother came back to the hospital and thanked sakusa for staying by your side. He left in a hurry to make sure you didnt see him there.

» Monday rolled around and sakusa was waiting outside of the school gates for you. he had planned on asking you about your "trip"

» "good morning sakusa!!" your bright and cheery voice rang through his ears. honestly he was trembling inside. the memory of you confessing to him still fresh in his mind.

» "how was your trip?" you stopped dead in your tracks. "haha... it was good !! sorry i forgot to get you a souvenir" you were trying to play it cool but sakusa could tell you were forcing yourself. "i wouldnt want a souvenir from where you came from so its fine" sakusa's words threw you off. "i - im not sure im understanding what you're saying sakusa?"

» you felt a tug on your hand. "dont you mean omi?" his voice husky as he whispered into your ear. cheeks flushed, your brain felt like it short circuted. you've always tried your hardest to not let it slip that you want to call him omi since he hated when people called him that.

» sakusa smirked at your cute reaction he got out of you. letting go of your hand he began to walk into the school leaving you at the gate dumbfounded. "and by the way. you're just as stupid for not realizing how long ive liked you too"

-» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

thank you for your order! enjoy~!

[fefipranon]

Rivamika Fic Preview

Topic: Mikasa, a hardcore feminist, kidnapped by Levi, the leader of one of the most powerful gangs and who is the book definition of a dick.

Mikasa Point of View (P.O.V.)

Here I am, another restless night. Turning on my bed like a hamburger patty being flipped on a grill, trying to find a comfortable position to sleep. I can hear birds chirping outside so it's probably already morning but my thick light-blocking curtains make my room look as dark as night. Whoever invented those, has a special place in my lazy heart.

I started hearing shuffling sounds outside the door of my room. These two have no sense of self-preservation, I thought. My two roommates, Eren and Armin, have been living with me for a year now. I met them ten years ago, starting my teenage years, a tragic event brought us together. Since 'that event', Eren's parents took me in as their own and he introduced me to Armin, his best friend since childhood.

We are inseparable, even now as adults. Even though Armin works as an accountant for a law firm, I work as a Computer Engineer for the CIA, and Eren works as a veterinarian, when we are together, we still act like silly kids. I love them like siblings love each other, which means that we also fight like siblings, and right now they are breaking a golden rule.

You see, I love them. I would give my life without a second thought for them, but, there is something I love more: my bed. I can be a charming and decent person, AFTER my morning coffee, and AFTER I wake up on my own. If anyone dares to wake me up from my precious sleep, there will be hell to pay. I am not a morning person, who is it really? Those who said they are, are not to be trusted, they are probably psychopaths and serial killers. I also don't trust people that don't like cheese, how could you not like cheese?! They are probably part of those reptilian people that conspiracy theories warn you about from alien abductions and shit.

I heard Armin's voice, "Are you sure you want to do this?"

I walked to the door to better listen to their conversation.

"She promised to join us for our traditional 'Sunday pancakes' today since she has failed to wake up early for the last four Sundays in a row! It's her fault!", Eren said.

"You know she is not a morning person! She will kill both of us!", Armin said.

I saw the bolt of the door shaking. Eren was clearly picking the lock from my room. He really has a death wish. I stared around my room looking for ideas on how to greet him, and my eyes landed on my hamper which was almost full of my dirty clothes. I walked to it and grabbed two dirty socks and rolled them together in a ball.

"You can still run away and save yourself.", Eren said.

"I will just stay out of her room, and watch how she kills you while eating popcorn then."

No Armin, you are going to get it too since you are not stopping him, I thought. Then, I heard the beep sound from the microwave. He really made popcorn, unbelievable. I rested my back against the wall next to my door, waiting for their intrusion.

"Do you even know how to pick a lock?", Armin asked.

"I've seen it in movies, they open everything with bobby pins on those spy movies so, how hard can it be?", Eren said.

I pinched the bridge of my nose thinking, he can't be serious. But knowing the bastard, he probably was, and I didn't have the patience to wait for him to finally open my door. So I opened it myself.

He looked at me in shock and said, "Mika-"

But I cut him short by shoving to his open mouth the ball of dirty socks. Armin was on the way to the microwave and yelped at the sight of Eren spitting the dirty socks from his mouth and coughing. I gave him a death stare and yelled:

"You are next!"

"Fuck no!", He yelled as he ran to his room with me running behind him.

He got into his room and closed the door before I could get to him.

With a sing-song voice, I said, "Oh, Armiiin, open the door now and I might forgive youuu."

"Bullshit! I will only open the door after you have your morning coffee!"

Suddenly, the smell of popcorn hit my nose making me smile. Armin never got to get his popcorn out of the microwave. He and I have this unhealthy addiction to popcorn for years now. I mean, who doesn't like popcorn? Those are other types of people I don't trust.

I walked to the microwave and took the popcorn out. I grabbed a fan and pointed it directly to the door of his room. I opened the bag and started eating in front of the fan. He will smell it eventually.

"That's a low blow, stinky feet!", Eren said.

"Is that!? Are you eating MY popcorn!!?", Armin shouted.

"Mmm delicious and extra buttery. Thanks for making popcorn for ME, you are so considerate. You shouldn't have-", I was cut short by Armin slamming his door open and running towards me.

I started running away but he tackled me, making me drop the bag causing the popcorn to fly out, "Give me back my popcorn you thief!", he shouted.

"Did you stuck your socks inside somebody's ass?! This smell is not human!", Eren shouted.

Ignoring Eren, I shouted to Armin, "No! I'll take it as a peace offering apology from you two for waking me up!", while we both struggled to get the bag making a mess of popcorn all around the apartment in the process.

Armin managed to run away while Eren grabbed me and tried to get the dirty socks into my mouth when someone knocked at our door.

We all froze, Armin stared at both of us and asked, "Are any of you expecting someone?"

We both shook our heads in response. I ran to my room to get my gun, Eren did the same while Armin watched the door and grabbed the gun we stored in the kitchen for emergencies.

I immediately started thinking of all the possible threats that could be behind our front door. This is all Eren's fault, I thought.

You see... I was deemed a 'child prodigy' at a young age. I started college at the age of 12, my studies were disrupted for a couple of years when 'that event' happened. Later I resumed my studies and by the age of 18, I already had a bachelor's degree in computer engineering. I joined a couple of hacktivist groups and helped them with the usual stuff: DDoS attacks to government websites, machine learning algorithms to find patterns in social media of government bot accounts, you know, the usual stuff.

One day Eren challenged me to hack into the CIA so I started with a social media scan looking for stupid people that post their work information, I just needed someone with access to the building. In summary, after finding a few victims I did a MITM attack on their phones and computers. From there I got access to the network, installed a backdoor, and had access to everything. I did a similar process to gain access to other intelligence agencies' networks from different countries.

Since we were broke at the time, I did ransomware of the data but instead of money, I asked for a job and immunity for the crime. I also sent them part of a list of vulnerabilities in their system and told them that if they wanted the full list they had to comply with my demands. Since I was already deep in trouble I decided to also give them evidence of the access I gained to other countries' intelligence networks. Not even an hour passed by, and they were already begging me to take the job.

Thinking of who could be behind my front door right now, I thought about the time I got access to the Russian 'Federal Security Service' agency and replaced their data with, well, some 'not-so-innocent' pictures. I think Putin hates me. There is also what I did to the North Korean Reconnaissance General Bureau agency... I think Fluffy Kim hates me too.

None of it would've happened if Eren didn't challenge me in the first place! It's completely his fault!

I got out of my train of thought when we were back at the door and Eren asked us, "Ready?"

We nodded in response, and Eren slowly opened the door.

He quickly pointed the gun at the unexpected visitor who was... An innocent girl scout who was trying to sell cookies.

The kid yelped scared, but Eren quickly hid the gun and said, "Oh, we don't want cookies."

"I want cookies!", I protested and pushed Eren away from the door.

"Order for me too!", Armin said.

Author P.O.V.

After getting their girl scouts cookies, Eren started making pancakes while Armin and Mikasa sat in seat stools behind the small kitchen island facing him. They had popcorn on their messy hair, and on their clothes. "You two better clean the mess you made!", Eren shouted.

"It was Armin's fault!", Mikasa shouted while Armin gave her a death stare.

Eren started to stick his tongue out while making disgusted faces.

"What's the problem Eren? Are you having a stroke?", Mikasa said teasingly.

"For fucks sake Mikasa! I have washed my mouth around five times already and I can still smell your stinky socks! Those things are a hazard!", Eren said while walking away to the bathroom to wash his mouth again.

"The pancakes are going to burn!", Mikasa shouted.

"You take care of them, stinky feet! I am on my way to drink some bleach!", Eren shouted back.

Mikasa rolled her eyes and walked to the stove while Armin stood up to turn on the television. While flipping the pancakes Mikasa took a look at her phone notifications and messages. She started looking through the messages from her girlfriend's group chat:

Sasha: OMG! I just saw the cutest guy ever!

Annie: Did you banged it already? 👉👌🍆

Sasha: I wish! I don't even know how to talk to him yet!

Christa: Where did you saw him?

Sasha: He works at a new bookstore that opened near my apartment.

Christa: Did you tried to talk to him somehow? Or just stared at him like a mentally unstable stalker?

Sasha: Well, I asked for book recommendations, he started asking me about what I liked so he could give me a more accurate one but the dick of his boss cut him off telling him to go back to the cash register.

Annie: Maybe we should meet up for lunch to come up with a plan.

Ymir: I just saw that I have new messages. I tried to read them all but my lazy ass just read 'cute guy' and 'bang it already' and skipped to the end. I am up for lunch and the 'banging plan'. Speaking of people in need of banging, @Mikasa wake your ass and join us!

Annie: 😂😂

Mikasa rolled her eyes and replied:

Mikasa: I am awake, count me in for lunch, and the 'banging plan'.

Christa: Girls, call the police, that is not Mikasa, that's an impostor! There is no way that woman is awake this early!

Mikasa sighed and typed,

Mikasa: Eren woke me up, putting his life on the line.

Suddenly Eren's phone made the sound of a new message notification. Mikasa rolled her eyes and thought, here we go.

Eren grabbed his phone, unlocked it, stared at his messages, and started laughing. "Sasha just asked me if you are okay because you are awake. She wants to know if it's really you before calling the police. She also wants to know if I am still alive."

"Hey guys check this out.", Armin said while turning up the volume of the TV.

The news was on. Mikasa served the pancakes on the plates. She took two of the plates and gave one to Armin while sitting next to him. Eren grabbed his plate and sat next to Mikasa. The three of them were seated on the sofa in front of the TV watching the news.

Breaking News:

'We are reporting live outside of Mitra's bank. Just moments ago, criminals robbed the bank and took three hostages with them. The police are tracking their whereabouts at the moment, avoid the area. The perpetrators' identity has been confirmed as the gang that calls themselves "The Scorpions". They are commonly identified with a Scorpion tattoo on their necks, reach out to the police if you see anyone suspicious.'

"These guys again, they piss me off.", Mikasa said.

"They are the same ones that robbed one of the stores of the mall right?", Armin asked.

"Yes, those assholes take hostages with them but they end up always killing them.", Eren said.

"That's the gang that posts the videos about they killing the hostages like is some sort of sick hunting game?", Armin asked.

"Yes, they take the victim to a secluded wood area and tell the victim to run, after a minute or so they run after the victim to kill it, recording the whole thing.", Eren said.

"That's sick.", Mikasa said.

"That's why they are one of the most feared and powerful gangs around.", Eren said.

"It doesn't make sense, the tattoo I mean, who would be so stupid to get a tattoo that clearly dictates that you are a criminal? Why have the police not caught them yet if they have a fucking mark on their necks screaming I'm the killer?", Mikasa said.

Suddenly Eren's phone made the notification sound again. "Oi, Mikasa, Dad wants to meet with us today for dinner, he is in the area."

"Tell him to pick us up then.", Mikasa replied.

-----

Mikasa P.O.V.

I arrived at the restaurant where the girls planned to meet for lunch. As I was walking from the parking area to the restaurant I felt the unease sensation that someone was following me. I've been feeling this for two weeks now. Even though I have gained many enemies by my hacking 'activities', and I joke about Putin or someone else knocking on my door, the reality is that it's highly unlikely that they know my identity. I didn't use my network, on top of it I used nested VPNs mixed with virtual machines with an eastern VPN added on top. Even though the probability of them knowing my identity is almost zero, my job provided me with an apartment in the most secured area in town plus extra police patrols around the building. But, of course, you can never be too cautious, so I always assumed the worst.

I took my phone out and texted my boss: "Activating precaution protocol."

Almost instantly he replied: "I will be on the lookout."

My boss, Pixis, has been very overprotective of me since I started working for the CIA. Since the first day that I arrived at the office and introduced myself, he personally asked to work with me. He was impressed by the stunt I pulled and introduced me to everyone on his team like I was some sort of Messiah sent by Thor itself from the land of Narnia. But not everyone reacted the same way he did when he saw me. It seemed like I wasn't what they were expecting to see since I do not fulfill the stereotype of a programmer. I am not a gamer, I am a ballerina, and what seems to be the worst of all to them is that I am a woman.

The biggest fear of a male chauvinist pig is a woman with confidence having success on a field dominated by men. When will they understand that women can do everything men do while even wearing high heels?

Ever since college, I've heard crap like:

"She probably slept her way in."

"Too pretty to be a programmer."

"A woman in my team? She will probably end up making us do all her work."

"She will probably need to be trained in the most basic crap. She doesn't look like she even knows how to do basic programming."

It's exhausting being a woman, why do we have to put double the effort to at least be noticed or recognized? When will they stop calling us 'emotional' or 'bossy', and start calling us instead 'passionate' and 'leaders'? We intimidate them because they can't control us and they know we have the potential to kick their asses.

I was snapped out of my mental rant when I received another text message from my boss: "Location received. As always, call me if you need to talk."

Good, from now on, until I turn it off, my boss will have a constant live feed of my location using my phone's GPS. Also, in case of emergency, I only have to press twice my phone's power button and in a matter of minutes the police, FBI, and the SWAT team will arrive at my location ready to get rid of any threat.

I can relax now, I thought as I opened the door of the restaurant and met my friends.

"Mikasa! We are here!", Sasha shouted while shaking an arm up to get my attention.

I sat at the table and grabbed the menu, the waiter was already taking the orders so I ordered the first thing I saw that was to my liking. Then I took out from my purse a box of girl scout cookies that I bought for Sasha and gave it to her.

She yelped excitedly and said, "This is why I love you!" while hugging the box.

"So, we've been booked for three schools next week.", Christa said.

Christa was referring to a feminist organization we all created that focuses on motivating girls to pursue a college degree, especially in fields dominated by men.

"I think that it's the most we've had in a week so far!", I said.

"Yes, people are helping by sharing our social media accounts. I have messages of people who want to join us.", Ymir said.

"We should hold a meeting for newcomers, we are going to need more people eventually anyways.", I said, and Ymir nodded.

"So Sasha, what do you have in mind so far to talk to your cute guy?", Annie asked.

"I have no idea, someone needs to distract the manager of the library so he doesn't interrupt us again.", Sasha said.

"Who volunteers as a tribute?", Ymir asked.

"Is the manager at least cute?", Annie asked.

"He was hot but had this unapproachable vibe, and on top of that, a jerk.", Sasha said.

"In that case, I offer Mikasa as a tribute.", Annie said.

"What!? Why me?!", I shouted.

"Because you never get intimidated or scared, and you always speak your mind. That personality is the greatest weakness of self-absorbed jerks.", Annie said.

I stared at her in disbelief while Sasha yelped excited looking at her cellphone.

"Girls! The package arrived! Just received the amazon notification.", Sasha said.

All of them gave me a devilish smile, confusing me, I asked, "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Mikasa, this is an intervention.", Christa said with a serious tone.

"We've noticed that you've been grumpier than usual. We also know that you haven't, well, how do I put this?", Ymir said.

"You haven't had a good fuck in a while!", Annie shouted.

I wanted the earth to swallow me whole right there. Annie said that a little too loud for my liking.

"Where are you going with this?", I asked.

"Well, we bought you a little something to help you deal with, you know, the grumpiness. It just arrived at your door.", Sasha said.

"Are you crazy! You know I live with Eren and Armin!", I said.

"Come on is just a package in your name, they are not going to open it.", Annie said.

"You definitely don't know Eren.", I said in disbelief.

When we finished eating I rushed to my car and drove as fast as I could to my apartment. I ran to the elevator and then ran to my apartment's door. The package wasn't there. I panicked and opened the door and saw Eren about to open it. I ran and tackled him making us both fall to the floor.

"What the fuck Mikasa!", He shouted.

"Why were you trying to open MY package?!", I shouted back.

"Because it could be something dangerous sent from one of your enemies, like Fluffy Kim for example.", Eren said.

"Why would Fluffy Kim send me something life-threatening via AMAZON!?"

"I don't know! Amazon sells some weird shit and they ship from all around the world, I am pretty sure North Korea is included."

I gave him a death stare, snatched the package, and went to my room closing the door behind me.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. I opened the package and found the box of a pink glow-in-the-dark vibrator. I grabbed my phone and wrote in the group chat:

Mikasa: Got the 'package'.

I put the phone down and opened the box. The thing brought batteries and had a little plastic paper that said, "pull here". I think is to protect the device from direct contact with the batteries, I thought.

I pulled the damned paper and the thing started having an epileptic attack. That thing had a demon inside and I didn't know how to do a fucking exorcism! Scared of it, I screamed and dropped it to the floor.

Apparently, Eren heard my scream because he shouted, "I knew it! I am not letting you kill her Fluffy Kim!" while slamming open the door of my room.

I panicked and jumped on top of the frantic thing that looked like it was break dancing on the floor, to hide it.

"What happened?!", Eren asked me.

"Nothing! Get out!", I shouted, trying to stop the damned thing from moving. It felt like I was riding one of those mechanic bulls.

"You screamed! Something happened!!", Eren shouted worriedly.

"What's all the fuss about?", Armin appeared.

"Fluffy Kim sent something dangerous from Amazon to Mikasa!", Eren shouted.

"Fluffy Kim didn't send me shit! Get out!", I said giving a pleading look to Armin.

He got my message and pulled Eren by the back of his shirt, out of my room, and closed the door. I took a deep breath and found the button to turn that demonic thing off. I checked my phone again and read the messages:

Sasha: Yay! You have to name it!

Annie: She's right! Put a name on it!

Mikasa: The thing tried to kill me! I literally just pulled out a piece of paper from it and the thing started to have a panic attack!

Annie: 😂😂

Christa: You can control the intensity, check the instructions! But first, name it!

Ymir: It has to be a sexy name.

I rolled my eyes knowing that they won't drop the subject until I give the thing a name.

Mikasa: Any suggestions?

Sasha: Just think of something that turns you on. 🔥🔥

Something that turns me on, something sexy, I thought as my mind went blank. I started looking around my room. I had a stack of letters and spam stacked on top of my nightstand. I sighed and went through it, I stopped at a promotional flyer for men's underwear. It had a couple of men modeling the underwear. This could work, I thought.

Mikasa: I found a flyer of men's underwear, the models are kind of hot.

Annie: You are messing with us right? 🤦

Sasha: Hold on, she might be onto something. What's the name of the brand?

Mikasa: Levi's, I like it, I will call it Levi.

Christa: 🥳🥳 Now, it's time to let Levi give you a good time!! 🥳

Mikasa: 🤦

I put my phone down and stared at, well, the Levi thing. I still have a couple of hours until dinner, how do I start? Porn? I thought making my mind go into another rant.

Another industry dominated by men, made for men: the porn industry. They try to sell a ridiculous idea of what 'good' sex is supposed to be. They show a man sticking his penis in a woman's vagina with little to no foreplay time. After that, they start going ridiculously fast, like the world is about to end, and start changing the poor woman to different positions like she is some kind of rag doll. They do all of this while ignoring the most important thing: the clitoris. If the poor thing could talk it would scream something around the lines of:

"I'm fucking bored dude!"

"She is faking it!"

"Feeling nothing bro!"

"If I would describe this whole experience with you, I would use the forever-alone meme!"

I locked the door and grabbed the thing, "Let's see, please don't kill me."

-----2 hours later-----

Mikasa: Levi, oooooh Leviiiii!!!!

Annie: 😂😂

Sasha: 🥳🥳🍆🍆🥳🥳

Christa: 😎🔥

Ymir: 💥💦

--------

Author P.O.V.

"Mikasa, are you ready? Dad is already here!", Eren shouted.

"Yes!", Mikasa said, opening the door of her room ready to go.

"Well, someone is in a good mood.", Eren said while raising a brow.

Ignoring his comment Mikasa said, "Let's go, we don't want to make Grisha wait."

"You are right, Dad has texted me like 5 times already since he arrived.", Eren answered.

They took the elevator down and walked by the building lobby. Eren looked at the security guard and said, "That's a new guard right?"

"Yes, he arrived around two weeks ago.", Mikasa responded.

They went out of the building where Grisha, Eren's dad, was waiting for them inside his car.

"We have to make a quick stop at the bank first.", Grisha said.

Mikasa groaned in protest and said, "You know that nowadays you can do mostly all bank stuff through the internet right? I can teach you."

"I need to speak with a manager, is an account that locked me out and they told me to go to the bank directly. It will be quick.", Grisha explained.

"Why do old people avoid using technology?", Mikasa whispered to Eren.

"I heard that!", Grisha said.

They arrived at the bank and Grisha took a piece of paper and started to fill it out with his account information. He told Mikasa and Eren to start making the line for him. He finished filling up his account information and walked to the spot they were in the line.

"I'm hungry, they look like the Zootopia sloths.", Eren said looking at the bank employees.

Suddenly, a loud sound was heard that shook the whole building. Grisha jumped on top of Mikasa and Eren throwing them to the floor. Smoke was coming from everywhere. A huge truck had collided with the bank's main entrance, making a hole. In an instant, a bunch of men with guns, wearing hoodies, and a clown mask entered the building.

"Hands up! And sit on the floor now!", one of them commanded.

Mikasa P.O.V.

Grisha sat on the floor hugging me, and Eren sat in front of me protectively. A couple of the men grabbed an employee and went through a door. After a minute they started going out with black bags. I remembered that I still had my GPS location shared with my boss since lunch. I grabbed my phone and double-clicked the power button, it was programmed to send a high-priority emergency signal to different agencies. I hid my cellphone, pinching it with the inside border of my jeans and pulling my shirt over it. At that moment, one of the men was walking in front of all of us. He was staring at each one of us on the floor.

Eren was covering me with his body when the man said, "You, move!", to him.

Trying to still cover me Eren asked, "Where?"

The man moved closer to him and said, "To the side, now!", and pointed the gun at his head.

Eren hesitated for a moment but then he moved. I was looking to the floor avoiding the man's gaze, hoping that it had the same effect as when a teacher asks a question in a classroom and you avoid making eye contact in hope that he doesn't pick you to answer.

I saw him with the corner of my eye as he lowered the gun and tilted his head. It seemed as he was confused for a moment.

Grisha tightened his hold on me and I saw the man pointing his gun again.

"You!", he said.

I felt a cold metal being pressed against my forehead. When I lifted my gaze I was staring down the barrel of a Walter Q5 Match Semi-auto pistol, held by a man who had... a scorpion tattoo on his neck and grey eyes.

"You are coming with me."

-----------

Want to know what happens next? Check the rest of the story here: 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27557422/chapters/67401547

or in Wattpad:

https://www.wattpad.com/980985373-saved-by-deception-encounter

[luminous-shifting-vibes]

actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server

out of context of course, what do you take me for? a sane person?

"they made lightning mcqueen hot"

"inch resting"

"Nix: Cars (2006) several people are typing..."

"im evaporating"

"enjoy precipitation"

"tow mater is more attractive than lightning mcqueen/hj"

"lightning mcqueen looks like he would call me a slur"

"why did I come back to a discussion regarding the attractiveness of vehicles"

"lark is the braincell of shiftblr tbh"

"you all need some grass in your life"

"me over here simping for block men and now literal cars"

"didn't nick wilde commit fraud canonically"

"i have no strong opinions on whether or not nick wilde is attractive"

"I AM AROMANTIC AND I AM NOT IMMUNE TO NICK WILDE"

"I am bisexual and I. Am not into Nick Wilde based on a simple fact he looks like he will drink all my pepsi and call me names"

"What is shiftbkr but not a bunch of simps"

"cries in Bianca Monroe"

"listen i have a folder called gayass

it is mostly pictures of kyoka jiro and virgil sanders"

"Nick Wilde x Reader where he steals your car 📷 carjacker to lovers AU 📷"

"he says "mama i like to step on keyboard""

"MY MOM JUST WALKED IN AND I HAD TO TELL HER I WAS LOOKING AT LIGHTING MC QUEEN HUMAN FANART"

"crab walks away"

""Y/N..." Nick whispered into your ear. "Your car...is a Honda Civic, right?" You looked up at Nick with a baffled expression. "Nick, my beloved? Whatever are you talking about?" "Just asking..." He said as he let you out of his embrace. "Hey, wanna see a magic trick, babe?" Your eyes sparkled. "Really, Nick? Of course!" Nick smiled. "Ok, close your eyes!" You giggled and closed your eyes, waiting for Nick to tell you to open up. Instead, you heard the loud rumble of a car starting up, and you open your eyes. Nick has stolen your car, and he has driven off into the sunset..."

"did y'all know his name used to be canonically Montgomery--he changed it to lightning mcqueen to get rid of his past"

"That is my exit number"

"cars trauma arc"

"wait do y'all know about car jesus" "as if jesus wasn't a ford focus in the bible"

"oh yall do not want to know about the trauma in my cars dr lmao"

"Dewit tau style babey make Lightning McQueen outlive everyone and stalk their reincarnations"

"Do they baptize other cars in like gasoline then"

"there is a pope car in the cars universe which means car jesus died for cars sins"

"NOT THE BOOMER MEMES"

"-lays facedown on the floor while caramelldansen plays-"

"like im serious how many of you guys endorse me falling face down on my floor" (NOT THE SAME PERSON AS PREVIOUS QUOTE)

"I will be Tall and no one can stop me"

"is a soft floor?"

"stop I thought faceplant meant like a succulent in the shape of a face instead of falling onto your noggin for a solid 10 seconds"

"Touch some grass??? What about eating grass"

"what if for every employee of the month i just printed out really horrible boomer memes"

"what ab smoking grass /j"

"Can the grassdirt smoothie be a special in the cafe"

"PLEASE IM ROLLING ON THE FLOOR REWRITINH THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE WHIKE SPEEDRUNINT MINECRAFT"

"you have to get good dirt from like the middle of a pennsylvanian forest for it to taste good though"

"I ate a four leaf clover as a kid cause i thought it would make me lucky"

"guys how do i see the mee6 leaderboard"

"I used to think i was half dragon and I ate plants out of sidewalk cracks"

"i think i punched someone"

"my parents told me to stop doing that so I looked at them and ate a flower"

"I ate grass when I was 9 bc I read warrior cats and thought I was a medicine cat ....................."

"bees are just spicy flies"

"I had a mental breakdown when I was three cause I didn’t know how to turn off a phone"

"My mom drank a bee once"

"when I was a baby I kinned ink sans."

"bro who here find the yellow hat man from curious george fine as heck 📷📷📷"

"mY LUNGSSSSSS"

"no one topping Him"

"I like em big"

"I think Moto Moto has no game like move over hunky boy I could beat you 1v1 Roblox Arsenal 📷📷📷"

"If you didnt have a crush on springtrap, jeff the killer, or Underfell/Gaster/Error sans don't talk to me /j"

"LOOK THEY'RE BOTH DILFS WITH ABS THAT WOULD FIGHT GOD"

"ZORO IS BANNED"

"Guys please help I found my old fnaf fanart from when I was 8 I'm in literal tears"

"OH NO BOT MY FIFTH GRADE HAMILTON PHASE"

"The worst attraction ive ever had has to be Sombra Overwatch"

"My family is like "save all ur art so I can sell it when you're famous" I literally could not sell this if I tried"

"screaming puppet"

"I just remembered Ive drawn overwatch/hamilton crossover fanart"

"my hermit crabs ate each other again"

"we're cannibals ????"

"having me here is a curse you have inflicted on yourselves and I for one am glad for it <3" "scitters around like a crab in anticipation"

"CARB DAY"

"WE NEED TO HAVE A WATCH OARTY"

"hey y'all ill be right back i have to throw away a crab carcass"

"if I watch cars I'm going to start laughing in the middle of it nonstop just because the word cars is funny and also cars are funny like how do you move silly little metal box with rubber circles"

"Lark asleep post catboy pitbul"

"Mwista Wowldwide! Nya!" "hermit crab 2: electric boogaloo"

"Is that why your name is chaos"

"manifest the crab power!!"

"cool dex fact: i can't read 📷"

"sighs adds to worship these entities list"

"with a knife <3"

"yeah and if he betrays me I could probably throw him across the atlantic ocean"

"give me his eyes"

"my good citizen i am a- wait no im nonbinary nvm"

"it worked on a fish idk what to tell you"

"what is gender??? Is that a board game?? If so can I be apples to apples that one's my favorite"

"CHUTES AND LADDERS"

"anyways actually my gender is Candyland"

"Oh god romes the destroyer of friendships/j"

"i am a simple gay i see math i run in the opposite direction survival instincts 101"

"math my beloathed"

"algebra makes me want to rip open a bag of swedish fish and swallow them whole"

"cackles in they're au characters and this will be very fun"

"pog !!!! me too ksajgks one of my drs is a sanders sides au"

"Is that bipper"

"tumblr sexyman"

"Good because he’ll fuck u up if u hurt a child"

"I want a wing-suit"

"looks like a bean would poison someone"

"my hermit crabs are cannibals what can i say"

"sonic the hedgehog kinnie"

"get yourself a man who is capable of the most ungodly actions but won't do them because of their morality owo"

"tell him he can steal my wallet"

"eyes"

"idk about y'all but I need blueberry sweet tea to live"

"y'know the red souls from soul eater i really want to eat those"

"but like only respectable crimes like stealing from elon musk"

"You can go cultbashing with he!"

"He acts like a flamboyant gay man, but if a flamboyant gay man was straight."

"Simp Satan 📷"

"definitely arson"

"They look like they enjoy lemon squares and other lemon desserts"

"Satan is all-powerful but he spends most of his time building honeymoon locations because he is convinced that the protag loves him"

"bc shes the reincarnation of his dead wife or something i guess"

annd here's a quote from our very own dream (@shiftingwastaken) that sums this post up:

"shiftblr but context makes it worse"

[multi-fandom-imagines8]

Warrior Queen

Request: Hey can u do Rhaegar x reader where rhaegar survive the battle and she is his Wife instead of Elia martell and the mother of his children she is very kind witty knows how to fight and is beautiful and angry at him and lyanna ( she survives) but loves little Jon since she doesn’t blame a parents sin on the child and rhaegar tries to win her trust and love since he loves her and reader tells him she was pregnant but lost it when she tried to protect the children and a lot of angst but fluff plea. Requested by anon.

Request: Hey can u do a rhaegar x reader where he wins the Robert rebellion and lyanna survive to and the reader is is wife instead of Elia and the mother of his children’s the reader is loved by many she is sassy beautiful treats the poor people with respect and is a deadly warrior she love little Jon as her own but is angry at rhaegar and lyanna since her children almost dies and lost on while protect the children rhaegar who is madly in love with Her tries to win her back some angst and fluff please. Requested by anon.

Request: Au rhaegar x wife reader where rhaegar survives and reader is angry at him and lyanna but adores Jon rhaegar tries to win her back but she refuse and can’t look at him without thinking how her children’s are dead because he decide to marry another man women . Can the reader be immune to fire and tells rhaegar she was pregnant but lose it while trying to save their children’s please (rhaegar loves the reader and reader is called the warrior queen. ) please. Requested by anon.

Warnings: violence, miscarriage, cheating, angst!

Word Count: 2149.

There were rumors about Rhaegar being with another woman, but you decided to trust your husband over silly people’s words. How foolish of you! Then Lyanna Stark was supposedly kidnapped and raped by Rhaegar, but you knew better. He took her away, fearing what you might have done to her out of rage. Her father and oldest brother came to plead with your father in law, but he killed them, starting a war, which was called the Robert Rebellion.

At first, you thought he was sleeping around with some random whore because you were pregnant. Since,men tend to do that due to the lack of sex, but you never thought Rhaegar would be one of those men. After all, he was kind, gentle, loving and caring. For all the years you’ve been together, he’s been nothing but good to you. Never raised his voice or hand on you.

The two of you met, while you were training. He immediately noticed your skills and instead of announcing himself, he decided to fight you with a knight’s helm on. You came close to defeating him, but he won. He was the first man to ever defeat you. You were curious to know who that man was and at that moment he revealed himself. Instead of bowing down to him, you complimented his fighting skills as if he was a normal man. That’s what he liked about you. You treated him like anyone else. With kindness and respect but not as if he was in a higher class than you or anyone else.

Naturally, you were loved by your people and each one of them would die for you.

Flashforward to the war, there were rumors that Rhaegar was killed by Robert Baratheon. The mad king was murdered by Jaime Lannister and the army of the Lannisters sacked the city.

“My lady, we have to go now. The King is dead and there are orders to kill you and the children” your handmaiden entered your room and locked it behind her. Luckily, there was a secret corridor that led to the sea, where a boat awaited you.

“Let’s go! It’s alright, you’re gonna be safe, I promise you” you kissed Aegon and Rhaenys’ forehead.

From the secret corridor, you took the children and stopped by Rhaella’s chambers.

“Your majesty, it’s time to go. King’s Landing has fallen” you informed her.

Unfortunately, she her water broke and she was about to have a baby girl; Daenerys.

“Your majesty, listen to me! You can’t have this child yet. If you do, they are going to kill it in front of you, then they will rape you and when they’re done, they will kill you. We need to move now! Just hold on a little longer” you wrapped her arm around your neck and helped her up and out of the chambers.

Your handmaiden took Viserys, Rhaenys and Aegon ahead of you.

When you reached the boat, you helped the queen on it first and started boarding the children, when three guards appeared.

“Kiyara take the children and leave, now!” You instructed your handmaiden.

“But my Lady-“.

“Do as I say now!” You kissed your children goodbye and as the guards tried to reach them, your Valyrian steel sword blocked their attack. “NOW!” You started fighting them and prevented the guards from reaching the children.

“Just three?” You asked.

“One can take you down” one of the guards said.

“If you’re so sure of yourself, why bring three? I’m the Warrior Queen. Who are you?”.

“I will be remembered as the knight who killed a queen” he smirked.

“Presumably you do live to see another day, do you think people will think that’s honorable. Three soldiers against a pregnant queen? I don’t know what’ll be more dishonoring that or that that queen defeated you and spared your life”.

“You are in no state to win” he looked at your belly and you looked down to see. You had been wounded when you tried to defend the children, but only now did you start to feel it. You feared that your nightmare has come true and that you’re losing your baby. You were so enraged, that you attacked them without thinking, tearing them limb from limb until two of them were dead and the third wounded and begging on the ground for you to spare his life.

“I would have, but you harmed by unborn baby and now I’m gonna rip your heart out with my bare hand” you knelt next to him and took his heart out from him to see before he died.

You may have one this fight, but you’ve lost the war. You lost everything. Your children were gone. Your husband was supposedly dead, the Lannister army control the city now and you were sure that you were losing the child you carried inside of you. You were badly injured and didn’t know what to do next. You lay on the sand next to the dead guards and waited for your death. Until you heard the bells.

A feeling inside of you told you that Rhaegar is still alive and is back with a bigger army.

You took your sword and went back to the city. Tywin Lannister saw you and because he knew he was losing, he wanted Rhaegar to lose as well. He took an arrow, lit it on fire and shot you in the stomach with it. Fire was surrounding your body, but luckily for you, you were wearing war clothes made of Valyrian Steel, so they didn’t melt, exposing your naked body to the world.

You took the arrow out and started bleeding again. You wanted Tywin’s head and you eventually got it.

“H-how?” He was surprised to see that you were immune to fire.

“You don’t have the time to find out” you slit his throat and ripped his head off.

Your army was winning the war and Rhaegar was searching for you, worried that you might have died.

“Y/n! Y/n!” He shouted in the streets of King’s Landing until he saw you from behind. He knew that outfit right away.

You turned to face him, blood all over you. Some of it yours, the rest of your enemies “Rhaegar” you muttered dropping your sword and collapsing on the ground.

—-

“Where are my children?” Was the first thing you asked once you woke up.

“They’re on their way home. You need to rest” Rhaegar placed his hand on yours.

“No, no! I need to see my children”.

“Y/n, you lost a lot of blood. You need to let your wounds heal”.

“You want to talk to me about wounds? How do I let my wounded heart heal? While, I was pregnant with your child, you were fucking Lyanna Stark. Then you dared to run away with her, leaving me and your children alone. Where were you when they sacked the city? Where were you when they almost killed your family? Your mother? Your brother? Your unborn sister? Your children? Me? You were too busy fucking her that your flesh and blood didn’t matter to you”.

“Y/n, I- I’m sorry”.

“Is that all you have to say? That you’re sorry? My baby is dead, isn’t he? His blood is on your hands, but mine as well, for staying here when I knew you’ve gone with her. How foolish of me!” You sat up and tried to leave the bed, but you were too weak to do so.

“Hey, hey, listen to me! It’s not your fault. I’m sorry for what I’ve done. I truly am. I will do anything to make it right again”.

“Can you bring me back my dead son? No, I thought so. I want you to leave! When the children are back. I’m going to take them away. Away from here, away from you. Away from the danger that surrounds you”.

“Y/n, don’t do this”.

“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t”.

“I- I love you”.

“That’s not even a reason to begin with”.

“I’m the king now! I won’t let anything or anyone hurt you”.

“You promised me that a long time ago, but look at us. How can you not let anyone hurt me, when you’ve been doing that all along?”.

“I won’t let you leave! You can’t take away my children from me!”.

“Your children? The same ones you left to die? Now you want to be their father? If it wasn’t for me, they would’ve died and me along with them, leaving you to return to nothing”.

“You need to rest. I will place guards in front of you chambers and a handmaiden and the healer will stay with you” he informed you.

“Are the guards for my protection or to prevent me from leaving?” You asked.

“Both” he admitted.

“I hate you!”.

—-

When Aegon and Rhaenys returned, Rhaegar immediately took them to your room escorted by Kiyara.

“Oh, my babies!” You sat yourself up and they ran towards you to hug you.

You winced from the pain but didn’t let them go.

“Alright. Children! It’s time to go, let your mother rest” Rhaegar instructed.

“No, I just got them back, I won’t lose them again”.

“They are safe here! Nothing will happen to them” Rhaegar reassured you.

“Liar!”.

“My lady” Kiyara bowed and greeted you.

“Kiyara! I’m glad to see you. You’re the only one I can trust in this place” you looked at Rhaegar.

“Then, she’ll stay with the children”.

—-

Days have passed and you were still locked in your chambers. The children would visit you every day, but Rhaegar didn’t let them stay that long. Finally, you have recovered and started walking normally again. Today was the day you’ll get out. You didn’t know what was happening outside those four walls that you confided in.

“I have brought you food” Kiyara entered your chambers and greeted you.

“I’m finally leaving” you expressed.

“About that…” Kiyara seemed uncomfortable.

“What is it, Kiyara?”.

“It- it’s nothing”.

“Everyone out of my chambers!” You ordered the others to leave “you can tell me now, what is it?”.

“It’s…”.

“You’re scaring me! Did something happen to the children?”.

“No. His majesty brought someone back with him” she informed you.

“Lyanna?”.

“Not just her. Aegon-“.

“What does Aegon have to do with it?”.

“He had a child with her a- and named him Aegon. I wanted to tell you so you wouldn’t be surprised when you see them”.

“That monster! He dares bring his mistress and his bastard child to my residency. My city” you were so angry at him. After all, this was a sign of disrespect.

You got dressed and went to the chambers where Rhaegar was having a meeting.

“How dare you do that to me?! What kind of honorless man are you?” You barged into the room.

“Y/n, we can talk about this later. We’re discussing important things”.

“Don’t ever speak about importance again! I’ve had enough. I am leaving you and I’m taking the children with me” you threatened and he immediately ordered the men to get out and close the door behind them.

“What has gotten into you?” He held your upper arms.

“First, I lose my child because of you. Then, I’m confined in my chambers for weeks, only to find out it’s not because of me, but so you could have more fun with her. And now, you bring her and your bastard child here. Why do you hate me so much? What have I ever done to deserve this?” You crumbled in front of him and he knelt next to you.

“I don’t! I love you! I didn’t tell you before because I wanted you to heal properly and I knew if I told you, you would’ve collapsed again. She’s only here because of my son. He needs his mother. Once he’s old enough, she’ll go back to Winterfell. I do not love her. It was a mistake! But I will not abandon my son, the way I did with you and my other children. Give him a chance!”.

—-

At the beginning, you hated that baby so much and couldn’t bear to look at him. Whenever you were walking in the Red Keep, Lyanna wouldn’t come out of her chambers, but Rhaegar took the child out, for your children to familiarize with him.

With time, you have grown to love him. After all, he was innocent and wasn’t to blame for his parents’ sins. He was like the son you lost. That’s how you treated him, but you called him Jon.

You didn’t let Rhaegar into your chambers or anywhere near you, but he understood. You needed time to heal and you might never forgive him, but he was trying his best to make it up to you for the mistakes he made.

[galahadwilder]

Unwise

Ch. 2: In Which Too Many People Turn Patrols Into Dates

Happy birthday @alexseanchai! You wanted more Unwise? Here you go!

*

Convincing Fu to let her bring out the other Miraculi on a semi-permanent basis had been a chore in and of itself. Feast had proven the depth of his paranoia—though, to be fair, it’s not technically paranoia if people are actually out to get you—and she wasn’t prepared to lose Tikki a second time. He’d refused to allow her to bring out more Miraculi, until she’d forcefully reminded him that A. she is a full-fledged Guardian now, he’d said that himself, and B. She, a child, is the one on the front lines while he hides. (She hates bringing that up, because she knows why he’s doing it, but it was that or go insane.)

Eventually, he’d relented, though he’d let her take only the ones who’d already proven themselves. Which was fine, it wasn’t like she was planning on doing any recruiting anytime soon.

She’d been planning to hand out all of the Miraculi herself, as usual, but as soon as she’d had them in her hands she’d paused, reconsidered. Chat was right—trying to do everything herself has been driving her insane. She already knows that, if she goes down, Chat can take the earrings and Mister Bug it up—or, in an emergency situation, just Cataclysm a butterfly and wait for her to get back up—so there’s a little bit of the weight off there. But the fact is, he was originally never supposed to know the identities of any of the backup, and if she were to have gone down in that situation he’d have been left to continue the fight alone in a way that she never would. The thought makes her want to vomit.

And she can’t deny that the way Chat’s face lit up when she asked him to help her distribute the Miraculi had done something funny in her tummy. Not love, of course, nor attraction—absolutely not that, stop laughing Tikki—but something. She’d laid out all of the Miraculi Fu had let her take on their favorite rooftop, then, after a moment’s consideration, handed him the Horse, the Bee, and the Dragon (she’d briefly passed her hand over the snake, but she saw the way he tried to suppress a shudder; curious as his reaction made her, she knew she couldn’t let herself think about what that was about, lest she learn something she shouldn’t).

She picked up the Fox, the Snake, the Turtle, and the Mouse, then paused, thought, made a decision. “You already know who the mouse is,” she said. “If you ever need an illusionist, and I’m not there to help you...” She held up the foxtail necklace. “This one goes to the Ladyblogger.”

Chat froze. “My Lady,” he said, the Dragon choker dangling between his claws, “are you... sure I should know this?”

She nodded. “You said yourself, I can’t keep doing this alone,” she said. “You’re my partner.”

There’d been no big meeting; someone might’ve noticed that Multimouse wasn’t there, and that would lead to questions she doesn’t want to answer. She’d made a list of reasons why, but surprisingly, Chat had asked for none of them, simply agreeing with her out of hand.

The whole thing is going swimmingly, and yet she can’t help feeling guilty about how she’d arranged the patrols. She’d insisted on not letting Rena Rouge and Carapace patrol together, since there was no way either of them could tear away from each other in a non-emergency situation, so for the first two few nights she’d rotated them through everyone but each other, just to keep from ill-advised makeouts. And yet, here she is, having intentionally arranged herself on patrol with Adrien...

God, she’s a hypocrite.

She can honestly say that after a week of letting other holders cover patrols, she’s more rested than she’s been in a while. But she’s done so many stupid things to spend time with Adrien, it’s not like one more will make a difference at this point, right? And at least this way she’s doing something productive with it. She hopes. If she can, you know, actually hold it together around him to do anything.

“Tikki,” she groans into her hands, her elbows propped on her desk. “Tell me I’m doing the right thing.” The cursor blinks on the anonymous Google schedule she’s been sharing with the team, waiting for her to confirm the time of her first patrol as Multimouse. Her first patrol with Adrien. She wonders, idly, what he’ll choose for his name.

Tikki sighs from her spot on Marinette’s pincushion, rolling a chocolate chip between her paws. “I don’t know,” she says. “Master Fu had very good reasons not to let the rest of us out of the box, but you also have very good reasons.” She looks up at Marinette, her blue eyes shining with compassion. “I do worry about you.”

“I’m just happy to be out and about,” Mullo says, climbing onto Marinette’s phone and poking the screen with delight. “So much new technology! I didn’t get to see this last time you wore me.”

“Not that,” Marinette says, dropping her hands onto the desk—then she tilts her head. “Well, yes that, but not what I’m asking about right now.” She sighs, staring at the calendar block. “Am I being... selfish, with this schedule?”

Tikki purses her lips, then turns the chocolate chip on its side and starts rolling it back and forth on the desk beneath one paw, staring at it pensively.

“Tikki?” Marinette whispers.

Tikki grimaces. “You know you’re not supposed to use your powers for personal gain,” she says. “I’ve told you before.”

Marinette swallows. “I remember,” she whispers.

Tikki tilts her head. “On the other hand,” she says, “this might be more practical than you think.”

Marinette blinks. “What?”

“If he is going to be a full-time member of the team, it might help to acclimate yourself to his presence?” Tikki says, a small smile spreading across her face. “We wouldn’t want you to start tripping over your words in the middle of combat.” She flings the chocolate chip straight up, then launches her tiny body from the desk, swallowing it in a single gulp in a manner reminiscent of the poster for Jaws.

“Hey!” Marinette protests. “I did fine last time!”

“You said one sentence and you had to use Sass to practice it eight times first,” Tikki says with a smug grin, crossing her arms.

Marinette bites her lip, then rolls her eyes. “You see how mean she is to me?” she says to Mullo.

“Hm? What?” the rat says, her head perking up and twisting back and forth. “I’m sorry, I was distracted by this...” Her turns back to the phone, where she’s been swiping between app pages with wide eyes. “Um, magic screen thing.”

Tikki giggles. “Not everything humans do is magic, Mullo.” She flits around to Marinette’s eye level. “Marinette. The day I told you not to use your powers for personal gain? That was our third time out. I didn’t know you then. I do now.” She reaches out, laying her palm on Marinette’s cheek. “You’ve grown into a responsible and professional young woman, and Master Fu has selected you to be the next Guardian.” She floats back. “I trust your judgment. And besides, you deserve a break.” She gestures to the computer screen, where the calendar is still waiting, unfinished. “If this is what you want to do? Then you should do it.”

Marinette swallows as tears brim in her eyes. “I—thank you, Tikki,” she whispers.

“Of course,” Tikki says, zipping forward to hug Marinette’s cheek again. “I love you so much, Marinette.”

“I love you too,” Marinette says, cupping her Kwami to her cheek with her palm.

“Oh my Guardians!” Mullo sobs. “You—you two— you are...” She rolls over onto her back, letting out a tiny melodramatic wail. “Your friendship is so perfect!”

Tikki snorts, backing away from Marinette’s cheek. “Okay. Back down there, Squeakers.”

Marinette sets her jaw, looking at the screen. “So,” she says, “I’m doing this?”

Tikki nods. Mullo rolls back onto her stomach, looking back at her expectantly.

Marinette nods back. “I’m doing this,” she says, and presses her finger down on Enter.

*

This was a mistake this was a mistake this was a mistake this was a mistake—

Sapis (who looks amazing in his costume, his gossamer half-cape floating off his back, furry cuffs on his wrists, black streaks in his carefully styled hair to resemble antennae—oh, she’s going to be gushing about this to Tikki later) is looking at her with eyes like the night sky, golden irises inset on black sclera, and she feels all the breath leave her body. She’s seen enough of Adrien’s patented “Soft Eyes” in candid shots from Alya that she thought she’d be immune, but nope, photographs have in no way prepared her for the real thing. Sweet Kwamis, she’s going to die and she hasn’t even said a word to him yet.

Say something, Ladybug, she tells herself. But under Sapis’ gaze, in Multimouse’s suit that she’s suddenly aware came out far more cute than her usual reassuringly minimalist design, she doesn’t feel like Ladybug, so when she opens her mouth, she only manages to squeak.

Nice, she thinks, mentally kicking herself. Well done. Very professional.

“H-hi!” she yelps. “Are you, um...” She grips her elbow, her free hand playing with the tail of the jump rope tied around her waist. “Queen Bee’s replacement?”

“Yep,” he says in an exaggeratedly deep voice. He takes a Superman stance, pressing his fists to his hips, and turns his eyes dramatically to look somewhere slightly behind her. It looks generally ridiculous, and he clearly knows it. “Sapis, at your service.”

“Sapis?” she says, squinting one eye, trying to remember if she knows what that means in Latin. Sagesse... that’s the same root, right? “Wisdom?”

His whole face lights up, and her heart leaps in her chest. “Old Latin pun,” he says. “Si sapis, sis apis.” He steps forward, holding out a hand. “If you’re wise? Be a bee.”

She stares at him, looking at his hand, then his face, then his hand, then his face. She has—she knows what she’s supposed to do here, but this is Adrien trying to introduce himself, and she knows it’s him, and he doesn’t know it’s her, and she has to get this impression exactly right. The joke is stupid, silly, it’s so very Chat Noir that she’s caught off guard and suddenly her chest is bubbling, she’s laughing, and oh god is he going to think that she’s laughing at him? Is he going to be disappointed? Is he going to be crushed? Oh Kwamis, is he going to hate her forever?

And then his eyes shut, and he giggles, pure and clear, and it’s just like that moment after the umbrella closed on her head. Lightning strikes in her heart all over again, and it’s everything she can do not to fall on her steadily reddening face.

Finally, he calms down, but when his golden-black eyes turn back to her he’s still beaming. “So,” he says, gesturing to her necklace, “Chat Noir tells me you’re really good with that thing.”

She reaches up, fingers it nervously. “I—pretty good, yeah.”

Sapis grins, hoisting his trompo. “Wanna show me what you’ve got?”

A slow, sly grin spreads across her face in answer as she reaches for her jump rope, the confidence building in her chest. This is familiar territory. This, she can handle. “You’re on, bee boy.”

Adrien wants to see what she can do? He won’t even know what hit him.